The Andersen Family Halloween 2013: Son #3 (L) is Jack Frost from Rise of the Guardians, Son #1 (C) is an M&M (yes that’s a plastic snow sled hanging around his neck!), Son #2 (R) made his own “Stevie” costume from Minecraft (yep, he’s got a paper bag over his face but he came up with it all on his own so I give him props for creativity!) and Jelly Bean is a “pink princess fairy with pink wings pink pink piiiiiiink!” My husband is, um, a college student and I went as a girl who’s been in a deep funk and therefore hasn’t showered in three days and requires a hat to cover her greasy hair but just be glad she crawled out of bed ok?
This Halloween there’s a new monster scaring all the kids on the block: the ConcernTroll, i.e. a person who says really crappy things under the guise of “concern” for you. And this year’s concerntrolling is brought to you by a woman whom I can only hope is secretly a paid actress/instigator from Fargo, North Dakota, who has decided that instead of handing out treats to children she deems to be “moderately obese”, she’ll be sending a note home in their sad little treat-less bag. To their parents:
Happy Halloween and Happy Holidays Neighbor!
You are probably wondering why your child had this note: have you ever heard the saying, “It takes a village to raise a child?”” I am disappointed in “the village” of Fargo Moorhead. West Fargo.
Your child is, in my opinion, moderately obese, and should not be consuming sugar and treats to the extent of some children this Halloween season.
My hope is that you will step up as a parent and ration candy this Halloween and not allow your child to continue these unhealthy eating habits.
Thank You.
Oh for heck’s sake. This is fake, right? I have to believe this is some kind of stunt because imagining a world where someone would choose to publicly shame a little Tinkerbell or Pirate makes me stabby. I mean, she’s literally taking candy…from a baby.
The woman then added in her radio interview, “I just want to send a message to the parents of kids that are really overweight… I think it’s just really irresponsible of parents to send them out looking for free candy just ’cause all the other kids are doing it.”
So just in case it’s not fake, let me point out the obvious flaw in her logic: Candy isn’t good for anyone. No matter what those kids weigh, you’re not doing their health any favors by handing out Kit Kats and Jolly Ranchers. The blood sugar rollercoaster of doom waits for no one! Also? Don’t be a jerk. Unless you are these kids’ pediatricians or the Tooth Fairy, you don’t get to “send a message” about their health. Not your job. Plus for all you know, those kids are as healthy as their thinner peers – my mom always tells me that kids often grow out before they grow taller. So if you want to be the health nut on the block consider all the kiddos and just hand out glittery tattoos and sugar-free bubble gum like the rest of us.
But let’s be honest. Being the health nut is fine – heaven knows I’ve done it (although not with good results) – but a big part of what makes Halloween fun is the candy. Halloween as a kid is a whole different ballgame than Halloween as an adult but nowhere is the disconnect as big as when it comes to candy. As a mom of 4 little ones I can tell you that kids think about candy 24/7. I don’t know what it is in our genetic hardwiring that makes babies immediately start looking for the sweet stuff but there’s a reason so many popular nursery rhymes have to do with kids sneaking treats.
(Although I’m still kind of confused about Little Miss Muffet and her curds and whey – I’ve heard the curds are supposed to be like cottage cheese which is pretty delish but whey? Have you had whey? It’s the watery part left over after making the milk into cottage cheese or Greek yogurt and it is nasTY. I’ve had good luck using it in pancake and biscuit dough but eating it? It’s so bitter that it’s actually been classed as an environmental toxin after Greek yogurt manufacturers laid waste to flora and fauna after dumping the whey. Maybe that spider did Missy a favor by scaring her away, is all I’m saying. SPIDERS SAVE LIVES. Plus they crunch when you squish them which is the ickiest sound ever.)
I had to include this winner shot because: Son #3. Over there on the left. He looks like he just impaled himself on his own staff. (Actually he’s mid-tantrum but the face is classic.)
Anyhow. Kids at Halloween are all about how they can get as much candy as quickly as possible and they’re willing to do pretty much anything to get it. We have to drag our kids around the block on an after-dinner walk but hand them a trick-or-treat bag and they’ll sprint around it for 3 hours with no complaints. And I have to say that society is totally on the kids’ side on this one. So far we’ve had a neighborhood trunk-or-treat, a community Halloween carnival, a church party, and school parties. Heck, my 6th grader’s party had 3 choices of beverages, 6 snack options and 8 dessert options. Plus candy apples as the craft. That beats the heck out of what we served at my wedding. Not sure what this says about my wedding. Or about the state of class parties these days. (I should have served bloody-finger cheese sticks and apple eyeballs at my wedding?) And we haven’t even got to actual Halloween yet!
Don’t get me wrong, like I said above, I’m not opposed to my kids having some treats. They’re kids. They should have fun. I have great memories of trick-or-treating when I was a kid. But I can’t responsibly turn them loose with six pounds of candy apiece. We usually let them just go nuts on Halloween night and eat what they want. But then what? In the past we’ve tried putting it up and doling it out a few pieces at a time but it turns into an endless string of negotiations, whining and wheedling and I do not want to relieve the Great Candy Conflict of 2012. Plus, and this is probably selfish, but I’m trying to stay away from sugar right now (for mental health reasons) and I just can’t have all that candy hanging around. Unless all it is is Tootsie Rolls, Candy Corn and Circus Peanuts, in which case they’d be safe even if I were starving.
So with that said, here are 10 creative ideas to use up leftover Halloween candy and I hope you’ll give me some more in the comments!
1. Dentists. Lots of local dentists will pay by the pound for Halloween candy. I’m not sure what they do with it after they buy it but hey not only do your kids get a little cash out of the deal maybe you find a dentist you like! (Although let’s try not to think about the ludicrousness of paying a large chunk of cash for candy to hand out one day and then turning around the next day and selling it for a fraction of what you paid for it. Which means you’re basically paying for the experience of walking around in the cold for 3 hours.)
2. Operation Gratitude. Our school, like many others, has teamed up with this charity that collects candy and then sends it to soldiers oversees. When I first heard about this I thought it was for treats for the soldiers, which is a nice enough idea, but it turns out they mostly give it to the troops overseas to hand out to local kids as a goodwill gesture. Awesome.
3. Save it for Gingerbread house decorating. Yeah your G’bread may end up a little goth but what’s cuter than an emo elf?? Plus, candy corns make awesome patterns on roofs.
4. Candy wreaths! Get you a foam ring and some ribbon and go bonkers! Super cute for decorating but even cuter as gifts.
5. Keep it for gifting. I probably shouldn’t admit I do this but I’ll often keep the candy that’s not obviously Halloween-branded and throw a few pieces into the gift bag or box with the gift when my kids go to a friend’s birthday party. Plus, there are so many preservatives in those things they will keep for a really long time. (Psst don’t tell my kids but more than one piece of Halloween candy has found its way into a Christmas stocking. Frugal!)
6. Poop pranks! If I need to explain to you how to do this then you probably shouldn’t be doing it. But for the rest of you with minds like a teenage boy, carry on. (And send me video!)
7. Baby shower/birthday/party games. There are an inordinate amount of games at various parties that require candy. Whether it’s counting skittles in a mason jar at a bridal shower or playing that gag-worthy sniff-the-candy-bar-melted-in-the-diaper game at baby showers, there’s always a need for sweet props! Plus they make cute decorations.
8. Next year’s costume. By next Halloween the candy probably won’t be good for eating but it will definitely be stale enough to hold up for a hot glue gun! There are so many fun costumes that involve looking like candy or wearing candy. (See my son the M&M for evidence.)
9. Recycled desserts for the holidays. Gym Buddy Allison makes these amazing Butterfinger-esque treats out of old candy corn and dark chocolate. They’re amazingly delish. Mini size candy bars can get chopped up into cream pies or as ice cream topping. M&Ms are perfect for monster cookies. Just type the name of the candy + recipe into Pinterest and I can guarantee you that someone has come up with a way to make unicorn poop out of it.
10. Crafting. Rainy day fun: Give your kids (or yourself, I won’t judge) toothpicks, glue, wire, curly ribbon, styrofoam or whatever and a paper plate and let their imaginations take over.
What do you think of the “concerned mom”‘s idea – good intentions gone awry or adult mean girl? (Or hoax??) What are you handing out for Halloween this year? (I’m handing out mini bottles of coke with a couple of mentos taped to the side. Kidding. But seriously if I had enough $$ this is totally what I’d do.) What’s your costume??
P.S. A huge, huge thank you to everyone who commented, emailed, facebooked, called, texted or sent me good vibes through the universe yesterday. I was overwhelmed by your love and kindness!! Seriously, I don’t even know how to tell you how much it means to me. I love you guys.
(P.P.S. Don’t forget – there’s still time to enter my Tide Pods $100 giveaway! This weekend is it though, contest ends on Sunday, Nov 3!)
I really really hope it’s a hoax. If she feels that strongly about it why not give out apples or pop corn to *all* the kids. If it’s not a hoax then she’s not someone I’d want anything to do with (woudn’t pee on her if she was on fire as the old saying goes !)
In Australia Halloween isn’t a big thing despite the candy companies best efforts. When I lived in the US for a year (I was 17) I really wanted to do Halloween but was travelling at the time. It looks like so much fun !
I hope you all have fun, and enjoy the day and I adore the costumes !
Curds and whey: warm whole milk and split it with lemon juice. Sprinkle with sugar and rosewater. Eat with a spoon. Basically junket, but easier. It’s delicious (but proves your point about kids and sweet).
Ok, first of all, if that is true, that woman is horrible. Shame is not a good motivator, people.
My kids are pretty little so we only hit a few houses, but I’ve been known to co-opt some of it for gingerbread house decoration. Love the idea of sending it to the troops!
As for Australia, my Aussie friends were just bemoaning on FB that it’s becoming a thing there. My friends aren’t too happy about it!
I totally believe a person could do that (the Halloween notes). Good intentions, bad approach.
The more I hear about this the more I’m believing this woman is full of manure. She’s just being outrageous to get attention. I mean, really, how DUMB are you to say you’re going to do this? So folks will know what a big butt hole you are and can protest you? If you really felt all “skinnier than thou” toward kids, you’d be sneaky about it and just give the notes without any build up.
I’m really hoping Faux News grabs onto this and uses it to “prove” there is a War on Halloween (to go with the supposed War on Christmas) led by that uppity veggie growing Michele Obama (cuz we all know she’s super evil, right? RIGHT! *snicker*).
Wow – does everything have to get political? And not very well done, either.
I think trying to shame a kid into losing weight is just awful. Not to mention kids little bodies come in all shapes and sizes and some just grow out before they grow up. Plus, like you said, Halloween is just characteristically unhealthy. It wasn’t until I lived in Austria for awhile and found myself trying to explain the point of Hallowewn that I realized how bizarre a holiday it really is. Knock on stranger’s doors and demand candy?
I let my older two kids keep their Halloween candy but the funny thing is, they never finish it all. I always end up throwing it away some time around Christmas. I do like the sending it to the troops idea.
Totally an adult mean girl. Pigging out on candy once a year is not a big deal unless you’re allergic/diabetic/whatever. You don’t get fat from Halloween; you get fat from a whole host of factors, plus time. So let the kids eat their candy tonight. Jeez.
Concerned deserves to have her house massively toilet papered.
On a related note: There’s an excellent blog entry making the rounds of the internet about whether or not to give candy to older kids:
http://www.davisenterprise.com/forum/opinion-columns/what-you-need-to-know-about-6-foot-tirck-or-treaters/
I’m definitely on the side of giving candy to EVERYBODY. You’re never too old to trick-or-treat!
My children trick or treated all the way through high school. It was a holiday they loved. My rules were that they had to be polite and they had to wear a costume. I didn’t see any harm in it.
Thanks for sharing this article. I just posted it on my Facebook page. I’ll be welcoming all Trick-or-Treaters tonight, too 🙂
I welcome all Trick-Or-Treaters too, even though we’re in a college town and have adult Trick-or-Treaters from time to time. I have full-sized candy bars I give to little kids and older teens who put SOME effort into their costume. Older surly kids get a snack-sized ‘treat’. My 7th-grader’s group included one kid who dressed up as a trick-or-treater – no costume at all. Our cut-off for Trick-or-Treating was before high school, but my 2nd grader begged his 9th grade brother to trick or treat with him this year. So 9th grader went. My only demand? A costume with some thought in it. An older kid needs to at least entertain the treat-givers with his costume. It is the price to pay for free candy.
Yeah, when I saw this I was really hoping it was a hoax! If not I think that’s even worse than the time a neighbor showed me, my friend, and my younger brother his taxidermied dog in lieu of giving us candy. That’s pretty sad when a note is worse than a dog with glass eyes. We’re handing out whatever came in the giant bag of candy I got at Costco. It’s our first Halloween in this neighborhood and I have a feeling we might get A LOT of kids.
My brother’s solution for what to do with all of his candy when he was a kid was a game he invented called “no pain no gain”. He would hold his cat who only liked him and hated everyone else and try to get us to tickle her stomach. If you managed to do it without getting attacked you got a piece of Halloween candy. And no, I promise he’s pretty normal today!
As a kid my family did make Halloween Graham cracker houses. Black icing and all. 🙂 You looked super cute last night by the way. Loved the hat! As for ‘concerned’ I think it’s a hoax to see how many people will react and bring them to the radio station. Lame, but happens a lot. Perhaps better than the alternative in this case, though.
I’m actually from the area and this radio station did a prank last year about a woman who thought that deer crossing signs are there to show the deer where to cross the road. I’m guessing this is the same thing. I sure wish they would stop these because I makes us sound like a bunch of idiots. And everyone knows ND is the best kept secret in the US 🙂
I’m 40 miles from Fargo, and I heard the morning show that brought this lady (and “Donna the Deer Lady”) to listeners’ attention. It is a hoax. I am impressed that one small morning show can get two things to go viral in two years, though. It was even reported on by the Daily Mail in the UK. But they can stop with this schtick now, as far as I’m concerned… Once again, it’s a hoax by one of those annoying morning shows, people. Settle down. : )
My son is too little for tricker treating this year but an idea I have heard that I like is kids can trade their candy for a toy or other non food treat. Do you think your kids would go for that?
Charlotte, I have to ask whether you fixed the woman’s poor writing or whether you copied from someone else who did. In the picture of her actual letter from the Fargo area news clip, she had had some grammar issues which made me angry at her immediately!
Personally, the woman irritates me because it’s a fun holiday that should be enjoyed by all. I think the news station should have given out her address so that people could avoid having their kids trick-or-treat there just to avoid her negativity. Of course, she will probably end up getting her house egged and/or TP’d anyway.
I won’t go into my spiel about this, only that I think there are better ways to get your opinion out there without potentially crushing a child’s self-esteem and fun evening!
It was most certainly a hoax…no worries.
I never believed in sugar sensitivity until we thought we’d jump on the “gorge yourself” with candy Halloween night bandwagon with our now 8 year old. We adopted her from China at 6, so I blame China (I kid, I kid). Things were great Halloween night (her first, our first as parents), but the next day a meltdown unlike we had seen before or have witnessed since took place. My mother (who was watching her after school when the horror happened) thought she was having a psychotic break.
Hence, as the older was explaining to the younger (also from China, now looking into the face of her first Halloween), we have three candies Halloween night because otherwise we’re “grumpy” the next day. Not sure grumpy covers it…
As to what we do with all the extras…they sorta “disappear” after about a week. Like the idea of sharing them with someone who might enjoy them as opposed to sending it all to a landfill.
One of the other bloggers I follow is having the “Switch Witch” visit her girls tonite. They leave the candy on the front porch and will get a couple of new books tomorrow morning. I thought that was a really cute idea.
https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=638530146191331&set=pb.111437015567316.-2207520000.1381857818.&type=3&theater
That’s a really cute idea, much better than simply not allowing your kids to go trick-or-treating. The trick-or-treat experience is about much more than eating candy.
Shame on that woman. The mental problems she could potentially cause handing that letter out to kids. What ever happened to trying to maintain the innocence of children as long as possible. The world is already a tough enough place without having your self esteem compromised by some adult during what should be a fun and innocent event.
I saw this a couple days ago & they said it might be a hoax but anyone that would do that – holy crap! Not her place & she better hire armed guards for her & her house!
As for the dentists – mine has candy on the counter all year long – I actually commented & said that maybe sugar free stuff would be better unless they are just trying to keep all the patients coming back – bad move for a dentist!
OK _ I missed something yesterday so I best check!
It may be a hoax, but I think it’s within the realm of possibility. On a parents’ board I belong to, one parent recently commented that childhood obesity is “tantamount to abuse”. I think we need to work on the adult ignorance epidemic instead of the childhood obesity one.
If it is real, it’s nothing that a dozen eggs and a good pitching arm wouldn’t fix.
The best response I’ve seen to this woman was in an open letter on a blog titled “Get the F**k Out of My Village.” The writer called her a bully, and he is absolutely right on. By singling out certain kids, she is ABSOLUTELY bullying them! Demeaning them publicly, making them less than, and giving permission for other people to do the same.
I hope this morning she’s cleaning eggs and tp off her property. I try not to wish ill on people, but…grrrrr!
It’s not a real letter. The radio station that this went viral from is known for playing pranks like this. I listen to this station, and so by default the morning show, when I drive my kids to school and when I heard them talking about it I immediately thought about last year when they had a call in from Donna the Deer Lady…google it. They are both pranks. It bugs me that they do stuff that gets people so riled up. It’s not nice.
Shame on that woman. I hope she was TPd but GOOD!
Candy corn and circus peanuts….now I want to go buy some! I have a harder time controlling myself with those nuggets of sugar than I do with chocolate…and that is saying something!
We used to be visited by the Halloween Fairy who would let us eat as much candy as we wanted on Halloween night but she would come in while we were asleep and trade out our candy for a toy. Rumor has it the candy went to work with my aunt who worked at a school for special needs and abused children which was enough reason for us to give them our candy when we realized the Halloween Fairy was as real as the Toothfairy.
Birthday pinatas! Frugal meets the next holiday.
If the lady really wanted to help how about handing pieces of fruit (even the ones pre-sliced and packaged). And, be really creative, include a pass to the local health club or recreation program. I am sure those businesses would love the attention.
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