9 am on a Random Monday Morning. Gym Buddy Allison Calls.
A: I have an idea. Let’s skip class today and go to the mall!
me: Oooh, will you make me a mix tape too? And then maybe we can hold hands?
A: Funny. I’m serious. Let’s play hooky from the gym.
me: Um, mall + 4 teeny kids = every retail clerk’s nightmare
A: I’m kid free!
me: How did that happen?!?
A: I dunno but it never does so I gotta get out of here before my husband changes his mind. Besides, you only have 1 toddler this morning. Bring suckers and a stroller, it’ll be fine.
(the sound of gears grinding in my mind as I try and figure out how this will affect our workouts for the rest of the week. Yes, I’m that compulsive.)
me: wheeeeee!
9:35 am on Same Random Monday Morning, Local Mall
Allison and I arrive with my two-year-old strapped in his stroller, chubby fist clutching sugary anesthetic on a stick, only to discover that the mall doesn’t open until 10. Shopping plans temporarily foiled, we join the legions of gray-haired mall walkers. We circle like the clearance-rack vultures we are for 10 minutes. The Children’s Place tricks us with their clear glass doors. They’re still not open. Strange, Auntie Anne’s: Palace of Twisted Carb Euphoria is open. And fragrant. Allison and I debate about getting a pretzel even though we haven’t worked out. Just as we are about to cave in, we hear the sound of metal grating. Our heads snap around and we see the holy grail of all sales: Old Navy. It’s open.
9:59 am, Same Monday, Same Mall, Old Navy
After all that anticipation we rush the door like Pavlov’s dogs at mealtime. Once inside we are greeted with the fabled Weekly Special – usually something so cute and so cheap that one must buy it in every. single. color. True to form, as soon as I see the special, I gasp. But this time, it’s in horror.
Old Navy now specializes in rib removals. For $10. Suh-weet.me: Did they lose all the non-anorexic mannequins?
Allison: How do I look?
The beauty of a 16-inch waist is you can totally heimlich yourself.
And it gets better. Not only was the shirt pinned within an inch of its sweat-shop life in the back:
But it was a size small to begin with:
We left the store empty handed.
The weird thing is – and you can’t tell this from the picture, sorry – but unlike A&F, Hollister and other teen retailers, all the other mannequins next to it were normal sized! It’s like they were just trying to mess with our heads…
PS> Isn’t Gym Buddy Allison adorable though???
I know this has nothing to do with your post but saw on Steve’s comments you are looking for a TCM #? I know several peeps that can’t run…..and have a number.
that’s just crazy.
and yeah, almost all clothes would look as great as us on the mannequins if we pinned our clothes in the back.
Wow! If you don’t already have an eating disorder, that mannequin might just single handedly give you one!
And yes, gym buddy Allison is totally adorable.
Jenn
I think I’ve now officially fallen victim to this super-thin culture (even while most of the population is at the opposite end), because I looked at the mannequin and couldn’t find anything wrong with it.
But now I’m realizing why the last time I tried something on at a store I was so frustrated because it didn’t look as good on me as it did on that mannequin, even though it was the same size. It’s because the mannequin had a waist the size of my calf.
And now I want a mix-tape and a trip to the mall with Allison. 🙂
What I love is that gym-buddy Allison completely disappears behind the mannequin. Did she buy the $10 special at an earlier time? If I stood behind the mannequin, my love handles would be peering around the sides!
whoa whoa whoa, hang on- new format looks fantastic!!
Ok, I hate mannequins.
But love that you played hooky from the gym.
(ps Gym buddy allison IS indeed adorable)
i was just in Old Navy but was apparently too busy drowning in a sea of newborn clothing for my NEW NIECE!!! to see the ribless mannequin. Love the pictures – you’re like an undercover secret shopper but for body image, not customer service.
Possibly the thing I hate most about clothes shopping is the pinning of the clothes on the mannequins, so that you have no idea how the item actually looks. I think I actually tend to avoid the mannequin-displayed items, kind of subconsciously but maybe kind of not.
Allison is TOTALLY cute.
So is the new format!
I also hate mannequins. I hate it when they pin the clothes in the back of the mannequins. I REALLY hate mannequins with no heads, but that’s a completely different issue.
(Anyone remember the episode of “The Twilight Zone” with the mannequins coming to life?
Scar-y! But cute, in a weird way.)
So cute Allison!! I’m glad you played hookie. I think the MOA opens earlier than Burnsville… Oh I miss my Minnesota retail therapy- I went to my mall on sat and it wasn’t the same BUT clinique has their gift on sale… Im being random but don’t really have anything important to say- I love the new format- I was hoping you’ld try something like that… 🙂
Like Judy I didn’t get scared of the mannequin at first either – erk!
But nearly every clothes shop in my city has mannequins like that because cheaply manufactured clothes are massive on the UK high street and the only way they can make ’em look high fashion is by putting them on emaciated model bodies. My theory!
LOVE the new look GFE! And Gym Buddy Allison is a real poppet! Great to finally put a face to the name :0)
TA x
How strange that it was only one mannequin that was that small – what’s up with that?
And pinning clothes in the back is so not fair – but i guess it looks good for the display, huh?
It’s good to play hooky from the gym once in awhile! 🙂
Nice new look (I get a feed so I don’t always come to the site). Gym buddy Allison is totally adorable and I totally envy your gym buddy. I wish I could find one – an adventurous one. Oh well.
I like me some Old Navy, but I generally have to go a size up on the tops there and a size down on the bottoms. So confusing!!
LOVE YER NEW LOOK!!
and am jealous of gymbuddy.
as always.
#1 Love the look. It’s you.
#2 Love that GBA is such a good influence on you. (And yes, she is adorable).
#3 Love spontaneity and people who can do it.
I’ve noticed that a lot of merchandisers will cinch up an outfit on a mannequin. Isn’t that false advertising??
Hopefully they won’t waste it! Maybe they can create a good man from that rib 🙂
Darcy – thank you! I need to talk to my husband about it and get back to you!
Judy – I probably wouldn’t have thought it was freaky looking if “normal” mannequins hadn’t been right next to it.
Chilerocks – Of course I remember that night of your birthday! That was a lot of fun and I miss you and your honesty immensely. You totally should have come back for the fair!
TA – I’d never thought of it that way!
AT22 – I have similar problems with their sizing – you are not alone there!!
kara – spontanaeity is not something I’m very good at with children, I must say.
Dr. J – you crack me up!
Thanks everyone for the nice comments on the site layout!! I sure like it:)
Too funny! Why, why, why do they have to make the manniquins freaks? And I always get mad when they pin the clothes. I want them to fit me like that, but I can’t go around with pins in my back.
LOVE the new look!!
I hate mannequins.
I love the new layout.
HA! Great! But sad. But great!
Auntie Anne’s is my personal devil. I flippin’ LOVE that place. I would have folded and been there until 10.
Char – I can’t belive that Allison talked you into skipping the gym!! But yes, I plan my life around my workouts! How sad is that? I thought the shirt on the mannequin was really cute and then you showed us the back of the shirt, all pinned up and then it hit me! It’s probably a size zero and that maybe the reason I never go shopping!
I love the new layout of the site also and I’ll see you and “Mall Buddy” Allison in class this week!!
SO adorable!
Now that I’ve got that out of my system, the mannequin is so NOT adorable. Eek. That’s horrible.
I always find it weird how the size smalls are always the ones on the mannequins, BUT they are always pinned at the back. You’d think that by now someone would have realized that either those are the kiddie mannequins, or else they are having serious problems with getting their math right to get it to the size of a woman.
Malls freak me out.
“Auntie Anne’s: Palace of Twisted Carb Euphoria…”
You know, if it was actually called that, I’d be tempted to go there.
And I don’t even like pretzels. Or the mall. It’s a formula for instant panic attack. The uniform fluorescent lighting, the stores inside stores (Double whammy. If you leave the store you’re in you’re STILL trapped inside a building. Run now, and you might make it!), the piped in elevator music…
[Shiver]
There’s something about the scale and the omnipresence of consumerism in a mall that just upsets me on some fundamental level.
I can’t knock consumerism too much, though – I have it to thank for so many things.
I hate when the pin the mannequins – my problem is that I’m always looking for fitted clothes to fit both my chest and my waist, and when they pin the, in the back, they then look fitted, so I think “ooooh!” then I pick it up and realize that it’s not going to fit at all. Fault advertising!
And love the new format. Pretty designs at the top and the notebook thing is cool 🙂
oooo new layout!
I love J Crew but I hate that they have these manequins (i dont think i spelled that right.) If the clothes look better that way- why dont they make them that way? OH RIGHT. BECAUSE NO ONE IS BUILT LIKE THAT.
Kelly Turner
http://www.groundedfitness.com
Absolutely LOVE the new format! The Post-its as tabs are just what my notebooks look like.
Anyway, back to Old Navy… I was wondering if maybe they used a child mannequin because they’d run out of adult-sized ones. Pinning the shirt in the back IS unfair. It brought back a memory for me too.
Back in 1989 when I did a bit of modeling, we did a layout for a buyers’ catalog for Levis. The shirt they put on me was a bit too big and they safety-pinned the back so it would fit better. Kind of makes you think…anything to make the clothes look better.
I love the new look by the way! I also gave you a shout out on my blog.
Jenn
Just have to also tell you how great the new look is 🙂 Might just be one of the best, totally fitting for the site. Did you make it yourself?
Naomi – no, I wish I were this good of a coder! I just did a google search for “free blogger templates.” It took me about 4 hours though last night to tweak the code to work for my site and get all my widgets back.
Thanks again for all the compliments on the redesign everyone! I’m liking it:)
LOVE the new layout Charlotte, totally you!
Awww, your all too sweet! No worries, there’s enough of me to go around!! 🙂
I am too glad that Charlotte played some hooky with me, we had a grand ol’ time and definitely need to do it again.
p.s. I hate mannequins as well!!
p.s.s – Thanks for sharing your free Kashi cookie with me!!!!
YAY! Pretty background! YAY! Cutie Allison!
DOUBLE YAY! Skipping a workout to have some fun!!
**Edited**
Not that workouts aren’t fun…but you know what I meant! 🙂
I love to skip a workout to go get hot fudge sundaes with the hubby!
And why do the mannequins always have to be decapitated? These are some sick, sick people.
jeez, I have never noticed this effect before – the accentuation of the Waist-to-hip ratio (WHR) of mannequins. I was too consumed with wondering why in the world they make mannequins with erect nipples!!!! right, crazy. When I was a graduate student, egged on by an enthusiastic PhD supervisor we actually did an experiment – heretofore unpublished – investigating the effect of nipple erection in mannequins. We found that people rated erect nippled (did I really just use nippled like that… sorry) mannequins were rated as: more sexy, more attractive, healthier, and happier. We also found that when people were looking at erect nippled (there I go again) mannequins people reported an increase in their personal feelings of sexiness, attractiveness, and general positive mood. Lastly, and most important to this high quality ground breaking mannequin research (which of course has not yet been published…) is that people stared longer at the erect nippled mannequins. I presume the same is true of the exaggerated WHR mannequins. It would be interesting to know what clothes they put on these absurd mannequins, either things they want to sell a lot of, or things they want to get out of the store because it’s an old model (like making last year’s fashion look good this year).
Prof. Platek, that is HILARIOUS!!!!!
I must say, I DO look at erect nippled mannequins more than regular ones. Sorta like staring at a train wreck. It’s awful, but you just can’t tear your gaze away.
Wow, I love the new look!
And that mannequin is hilarious–not only is the waist ridiculously narrow, but the shoulders are freakishly broad. It’s a whole new race of triangle people!
Oh, and I also loved your promo thingy over at BISJ!
Good for you for not buying the shirt! I’ve always thought it was stupid when they pin those shirts tight to a mannequin. Even if we want a shirt to fit more snugly, are we going to pin it in the back? I don’t THINK so… 🙂