Here’s a diet tip for you: Eat with a bear. I bet you eat less. Just try it and see.“She is a great example of fulfilling your destiny. She’ll order dessert and take one bite and then pour the salt shaker over it. She’s about living consciously.”
~ Ali Vincent, first female winner of The Biggest Loser, had this to say about working with trainer Jillian Michaels*.
Setting aside for the moment my ambivalent feelings about Ms. Michaels – I’ve swung all the way from hater to budding girl crush on the love spectrum – I take issue with anyone, celebrity or otherwise, talking about “living consciously” and “fulfilling your destiny” by manipulating your food. Your food is not your consciousness nor your destiny. Do you know why? Because your body is not the sum of your consciousness nor your destiny. We are more than what we eat. We are more than what we look like.
The Anorexic’s Notebook
Several years ago when the media was all aflutter over “Pro-Ana” and “Pro-Mia” sites – a small subset of websites that enable girls in pursuing their disordered lifestyles – many eating disorder “tips” were published in the news. For those of us who already possessed the eating disordered mindset but up until then blissfully unaware of such sites, this was like a gold mine. I’m not proud to admit it but I spent a considerable amount of time on those websites. Mostly they were not what the media claimed them to be – i.e. fist pumping bastions of alternative lifestyles (die-styles?) – but rather collections of depressed, withdrawn and highly competitive sick girls. Most of them (us?) didn’t want to stay disordered forever. Most of us realized how much our eating disorder took from us. But all of us wanted to be thin. And so the site authors published tips and tricks for getting to that Waif Ideal.
Some tips were bizarre like the fabled and much reported “eat toilet paper because it fills you up and has no calories” one. I personally never knew anyone that did that or even said they did that although apparently it had enough cultural cache to make it on a Law & Order episode. Other tips were painful, like swallowing cups of vinegar to take away your appetite (and your esophogus!) or punching yourself in the stomach to quell pesky hunger pangs. But there were quite a few tips that actually sounded a wee bit sensible, especially to a person desperate to lose weight. My favorite of those is the Food Destroying tip.
Annihilate Your Food
Those of you that had the dubious pleasure of watching me on the Mike and Juliette Fox News Morning Show last April may remember the host Juliette asking me about spraying Windex on a hamburger to keep myself from eating it. While that particular incident was not true (seriously, do these people not have cue cards for a reason??) as I was mostly a vegetarian, the general idea behind it was true.
When I was 15 I took an ill-advised job as a waitress for the catering department of the nearby university. Very quickly I discovered that not only was I younger and more naive (as evidenced by the fact that I did not wear a black or red bra peeking out under my white tuxedo shirt) than most of my fellow waitresses but I was also, well, chubbier. At least to my eyes. In a profession that relies heavily on being attractive to make money, the svelte sylphs I worked with soon became my idols.
Due to the above-par talent of the chefs, we were constantly surrounded by an array of rich and delicious foods. Yeah we had to serve the dreaded and nasty “pasta bar” on more occasions than I care to remember but there was always something fattening and exquisite to be had back in the kitchens. The temptation of the meltaway cookies was great for me. But so was my desire to be accepted. And so I watched those girls very carefully to see how they maintained their figures.
They destroyed their food.
Sometimes that entailed drowning it in an incompatible or extreme flavor like salad dressing on cheesecake, raw horseradish layered on creme brulee or even, like Jillian, the contents of the salt shaker poured out over 50$/plate prime rib. Other times it meant “accidentally” spilling cleaning fluid on the leftover butterflake rolls or over squirting dish soap into a chafing dish of hollondaise sauce. The entire goal was to make your plate of food as unappealing as possible. We didn’t hide it. In fact, it became a game. The mealtime sport was who could eat the least dinner (and drink the most Diet Coke!) at dinner time.
Back to the Present
And so it is with much trepidation that I read this diet tip from the famed trainer-to-the-hoi-polloi. Not only do I take issue with the blatant wastefulness of the gesture – “Look! I can afford to pay 7.95$ for a decadent piece of gourmet restaurant cake and I am so wealthy that I can afford to take one bite and then render the rest inedible.” – but I am also offended by what this says about our bodies. To me, this displays an inherent distrust of your body. It makes it so that you treat your body as if it were an enemy to be conquered, subdued, or tricked rather than what it is – your ultimate partner in your health and well-being.
If all Jillian really wants is one bite of cake, then why not instruct her server to only bring her one bite of cake? (Oh, they’ll do it! Especially if she’s still paying full price for it.) Or why doesn’t she split the piece with the whole table? Everyone gets a bite. Instead she perpetuates a method of disordered eating that, frankly, is a very slippery slope. What’s next? Eating food out of the garbage can that you threw away in an attempt to make it inedible?
Food is a gift. It is not something to be feared or demonized but rather to be eaten with joy and thanksgiving. Take it from someone who has eaten food out of the garbage.
So what do you all think? Does living in an super-size world call for extreme dieting methods? Or does this sound insane to anyone else?
*Note: Not having any first hand knowledge of Jillian Michael’s eating habits and never having seen the show (I’m still not watching TV), I do not know if Ali Vincent’s allegation is true.
As an overeater all my life, I really don’t have a problem with this. I have trouble not eating all of something. I have just had my membership in the Clean Plate Club revoked by starting Weight Watchers.
Regardless, considering the plight of some, I can see how this could be disturbing. But, for someone who wants to enjoy a small amount of something they tend to eat too much of, I don’t think it’s bad. It’s the same as throwing it away after a few bites, which I’ve done on many occasions.
Personally, I would have the whole darn piece of cake and work longer that day. Or not. I mean things balance out when one is very active, and eats healthy most of the time. Jillian is that kind of person, right?
I understand leaving some food on your plate ( and I’m all for it, if you’re no longer hungry), but the idea of pouring salt all over food after only taking a bite makes me pause. Why not either share the cake or skip it and go buy a really good piece of chocolate? It’s less expensive and you get to eat the whole thing. (Plus, if it’s dark chocolate, it’s good for you!)
Or, just eat the dang cake and enjoy it, fer cryin’ out loud?
Food is not evil. It’s a blessing.
It seems daft to me… I mean isn’t the whole point to learn how to eat better and in moderation. You’re so right, it’s like treating yourself as if you’re totally out of control and unless you physically ruin the food you can’t be trusted not to eat it. Telling yourself that you can’t be trusted cannot be good for self-confidence or self-esteem.
Great blog by the way! Love your writing.
I go back and forth. not having walked a mile in so many people’s shoes I CANT say whether it’s right or wrong (not something Id do. Id more likely ask for a box and give it to a homeless man I know fairly well)—-BUT IMO recommending it is irresponsible.
M.
I read this in Ali’s interview on Weighting Game and it made me choke. I’m so glad you wrote about it because I was SO mad I couldn’t actually articulate myself, and now you have done it for me, beautifully and eloquently. Thankyou!
I used these kinds of tricks all the time. I’d dump my meals in the kitchen sink and pour washing up liquid all over them. It is about not trusting yourself. It is about treating your wants or needs as a petulant child that needs to be controlled, without establishing the motivation behind those wants and needs first. Would you treat your OWN child like this? Would you pour salt over the dessert he or she wanted so badly? No? Then why treat yourself any differently?
Although NOW I’m guilty of getting everyone else to order dessert and then smooth-talking my way into stealing some of theirs. I’m so glad I’ve moved on from manipulating myself OUT of dessert. Now I just manipulate other people into giving me it :0)
TA x
Great post.
I think it might not be a big deal if someone occasionally removes temptation in a dramatic way like that–assuming for some reason they’re in a situation where they’ve got too much food by mistake and can’t share it or save it or even just get it cleared away.
But to live a whole lifestyle that’s so focused on eating and not eating and obsessing about food and calories seems to be the underlying problem. And culturally, we’re really f*cked because we’re surrounded by media that perpetuates just that kind of thinking.
Thanks for calling ’em out on it.
i think every grown adult is capable of making their own eating decisions without being scrutinized. Often, self control is not enough to prevent you from eating and obviously she’s not so disordered that she won’t eat out. If Jillian Michaels really had a problem she wouldn’t be as fit as she is, and she wouldn’t be eating out. she’d be sticking to pre portioned meals with exact calorie counts.
hepsmom – thank you for your perspective!It’s sounds much more sensible when you sayit that way.
alice – Yeah, I think if anyone could afford to eat a whole piece of cake it would be her!
azusmom – mmm…. dark chocolate!
crazylady – thanks for the compliment:) And I love the word “daft” – perfect!
mizfit – I agree. Which is why I posted this. I do realize that not everyone lives in the kind of crazy headspace that I do. This could be a legit tool for some people. I just don’t think it is for me!
TA – Aw girl, you’re like my long-lost twin! I knew you’d get where I was coming from. And wtg on the amazing progress you’ve made! I didn’t realize until recently that you’ve only been recovering for a year or so? You’re doing fantastic!!
Crabby – excellent point about addressing the underlying problem. We really do have such a messed up culture regarding food.
anon – very true! Every adult can make their own choices! And I do not envy her position. She must be scrutinized in every bite she takes. Perhaps the ends do justify the means in this case?
Can I just address Anonymous for a second?
I concede that Jillian may well not have a problem. But just because somebody is fit, does that automatically mean they are not disordered?
And doesn’t it make it more seductive for Jillian’s fans to copy her tactics if she’s such a great physical example? If Jillian is in great shape, ergo it must be healthy thing to do, right? It’s a slippery slope, and it’s being advocated to a LOT of people.
Dangerous, in my opinion at least.
TA x
Hmmm…while this does strike me as odd, it brings me back to the episode of “Sex in the City” where Miranda eats cake out of the garbage. WHO would do that, right? (ahem…not me, nope…never).
I have resorted to similar acts in desperate times, but I can only think of one thing – what kind of message would this be to a child? Probably a very confusing one and not very positive. That said, if someone is struggling and fighting to not binge (and man, I know all about that!), they might have to resort to these things. If it were me, I would just be careful who was there to watch. If I had seen my mom do this when I was younger, it would have sent an extremely confusing message about food.
Great post, Charlotte.
I have always been a member of the clean plate club, and have a big problem leaving even a single bite of food on my plate. Especially at restaurants. But I’ve never resorted to food mutilation to help me conquer my over-eating.
Whatever happened to the ideas of breaking off half a cookie and putting the other back in the package? Ordering only half an entree, or having the waiter pack up half before you even start eating?
I may be biased. Being a poor student means I’m always happy to have leftovers in the fridge. I’d never waste the money or the food to destroy it.
To me someone of the health profession, shouldn’t be doing something like this….their suppose to be promoting health not extremes of how to get there
Yes, it sounds very worrisome to me, too. With all my research into nutrition, I’ve stumbled upon a lot of diet books/websites which help people who are obese or overweight to lose weight by using tricks like that, and every time I read them I’m always painfully aware of how easy it would be to shift those ideas into something terribly eating-disordered.
I’d be eating that cake. I don’t like sabotaging food. Hell, I get enough people staring at me weirdly in restaurants just because I’m getting salad dressing on the side; why would you want your dinner companions to think you’re even MORE insane by sprinkling salt all over your cake to prevent yourself from eating it?
(besides… I can totally see something happening of trying to eat around the salt. Things like that are kinda destined to fail, one way or another…)
I had no idea!
Having a normal relationship with food is such a huge challenge now-a-days. It’s easy to see where it’s gone, but how to return to normal…
I rad that quote and immediately lost my girlcrush on both Jillian and Ali. Can they not see how dangerous that attitude is?
Share the piece of dessert (like my girlfriends and I did the other night) or don’t order any if you’re just going to destroy it.
To me, this idea of destroying your food is stupid. It creates a situation where food is the enemy and to me, that’s a sign of disordered eating. Food is NOT the enemy!
What a fantastic post! You’re quite the writer =)
I too have battled with many food related issues.
“To me, this displays an inherent distrust of your body. It makes it so that you treat your body as if it were an enemy to be conquered, subdued, or tricked rather than what it is – your ultimate partner in your health and well-being”.
I couldn’t have said it better. Loved the post.
I was never a fan of the biggest loser, but I was a fan of Jillian. And while I concede that it’s impossible to build muscle without getting enough calories, couldn’t Jillian (as a personal trainer) be able to make room in her diet and exercise program for the occasional piece of cake?
I’m really glad that you wrote this. I initially read the interview and thought “What a great idea!” but something about it didn’t quite sit right with me. I couldn’t put my finger on it, but I think you hit the nail on the head here. I was not aware that this was an ED tip of sorts.
Besides being bothered by the wastefulness, I kind of felt like I’d rather not have the stupid dessert if I have to do all that to control myself. If that is what she has to do to keep that body, I’d rather not have it. Would a bit of dessert really ruin everything? I couldn’t live like that.
I agree with you on the not-wasting-precious-food-tip. I’m not one for spilling dish soap on my cheesecake but I can see that, for some people, it could help to get the food out of sight/out of mind, like after a big meal, if you have some pasta left over and are trying to watch your weight, you want to get it away before you mindleslsy eat it. Some people cover it with a napkin – that doesn’t work for me b/c I know what’s UNDER the napkin. Some ask the server to take it away, which I’ve done. But I tend to be a clean plate club member so that rarely happens. I don’t think Jillian has a serious problem – she was probably showing the BL contestants that it IS possible to just have a bite or two of dessert. I also don’t think Ali meant to link “fulfilling your destiny” with “pouring salt on your food.” It was just stream of consciousness and her attitude is so bright and positive overall…
She got one of the guys to do this recently when the teams were in Vegas this season. At the time it was done to compensate for his lack of willpower within the game. Something about after the first bite its not nearly as good anyhow. I agree that its wasteful, but it makes for good TV (I guess).
I just think that it’s so wasteful! It costs so much money and resources (gasoline, manpower, carbon footprint) to get all the ingredients there, and then you’re just going to throw it away after one bite? I like the idea of just taking a couple bites and having everyone else do the same. Or take it home and have a bite every day, instead of the whole thing all at once.
I do not approve of ordering an item to have one bite, then destroying the item.
I think it sends the wrong message to oursevles: the food we want is somehow “evil” and must be destroyed. AND I cannot be responsible for my own actions and simply eat what I desire from this food, then share the rest with others.
Really, sharing a dessert with friends is an acceptable practice.
Food is about balance. LIFE is all about balance. Better we learn that lesson than learning tricks to mess with balance.
It sounds as though Ms. Michaels enjoys impressing others with her power over food, which of course is evil. It sounds as though its working if you look at the method through which this information has been passed along. That is the sad reality. Those who can say no may as well be politicians.
What bizarre behaviour. At first I thought it was some twisted way to add electrolytes. Really!
Jillian is simply demonstrating her lack of willpower. Since she is unable to resist the food on it’s own, she augments her courage by ruining the food. What she fails to realize is that her dessert is highly processed, and represents a substantial net input of resources. Salt is, in many parts of the developing world, quite a precious commodity. So, for me, this gesture represents not only wastefulness but an inherent ignorance of the problems millions of people in the world are facing, right now.
I was raised to believe intentionally wasting food was almost sinful. I don’t think I feel any different now – perhaps more so, as my awareness of global issues has increased.
This person is supposed to be an example? If someone did something like that in front of me, I’d have considered it very poor manners indeed. Why didn’t she just spit in the food? It’d be less wasteful, and more polite.
Personally, I think this represents an instance of evolutionary brilliance. Here you have someone actually taking hold of their own behavior. I would prefer to know someone who purposefully destroys, or annihilates (great word), their food in order to avoid eating as opposed to crying “it’s not my fault”, “it’s my parents fault”, or some other B.S. excuse way of externalizing responsibility.
OK, that being said, I would not encourage anyone to do such because it’s f-ing crazy, but hey sometimes crazy begets brilliance. I think people should take personal responsibility for their eating, actions in general actually. I mean I overeat constantly, they should pay me, really. But I just get upset with myself and exercise harder or something. Anyhow…
…. the Biggest Loser – what a f’ed up idea for a show. Hey I have a brill idea, let’s recruit a bunch of fat folks, put them on TV and “help” them to lose weight. We can even celebrate the most extreme loser. In that wake that is a catastrophe of defeat, we will kick off people that do not lose enough weight. These are the “real” losers – they don’t lose enough weight, they get kicked off. Any guesses what the first thing they do is probably going to be? Eat? Maybe… Then that image, you “lost because you did not lose ENOUGH weight” well that just eats me up. That is the type of underhanded media SHITE that stirs my pot.
I could think of a million more interesting TV shows, but here’s one I would want to see: Love Hurts. You could recruit a bunch of people with sexual dysfunction. Then “trained, expert therapists, etc” “professionals” (please note the excessive use of ” ” is intentional) to “treat” the participants. Then when one dude can’t get it up or one chick fails again to experience that orgasm that has been eluding her since she was devirginated, we kick them off the show. But we dont watch that part of the show. No. They tape and show the aftermath of said kicking off so that we can morbidly observe the path of despair that haunts their existence. (extreme, sorry). This is exactly what this Biggest loser show is doing – developing a sense of reliance on external factors of control for their weight loss (I couldnt have done it without the show, trainer, etc), but when they do fail, sorry your out!
Anyhow, another cool post Charlotte.
Cheers…
I ate cookies out of the garbage about a week ago, and couldn’t believe how low I felt. I was so embarassed and ashamed. It was a big wake up call to me that I need to take better care of my mind, my body, and my soul. Thank you for admitting that you have done the same. It’s good to know that I’m not the only one.
Ugh. I do detest the seemingly endless stream of unhealthy tips that seem to be continually repackaged for women.
“Food is a gift. It is not something to be feared or demonized but rather to be eaten with joy and thanksgiving. Take it from someone who has eaten food out of the garbage.”
This is absolutely true and I agree that encouraging people to obsess about their food and body is by no means mindful or ‘living consciously’ because to me living consciously means dealing with the feeling of “I’m not okay the way I am.” that drives so many of us to: control food, overeat, or otherwise obsess over our bodies and lives as a means to compensate.
“Food is a gift. It is not something to be feared or demonized but rather to be eaten with joy and thanksgiving.”
I love what you said here! This is going in my “book of quotes/words of wisdom.” 🙂
Oh, Prof. Steven, I could not agree with you more!!!!! That is EXACTLY what that show is doing!
I know I keep bringing this up, but there was an article in either “Time” or “Newsweek” last year about the show. They interviewed a lot of the participants, who talked about the things they would do to lose extra weight. Like taking diuretics, not drinking water before the weigh-in (like, for an ENTIRE DAY before the weigh-in!), and exercising 6-8 hours a day.
BTW, the first season winner has gained all the weight back.
THIS is what is being presented as a healthy way to lose weight?!?!?!
Wow, I had no idea that The Biggest Loser was so filled with slings and arrows. As an obese person trying to work my way down, I have common sense to know that I shouldn’t have the hopes of losing 8 pound in a week. I suppose I do have a disorder because I am obese, but I know that it is my choice over time that has brought me here and it will be a different choice over time that brings me back down. I don’t believe in magic numbers, but I do believe in moving more and eating less and eating higher-quality foods. It seems as if some think that people don’t have common sense. I’m not sure about anyone who actually watches The Biggest Loser and expects the same results in a “normal” life.
I enjoy Jillian and her tactics. I am a drag ass and need what I am sure that some consider “abuse” to get me to exercise. She is the epitome of tough love. That said, that style is not for everybody. If you don’t like it, don’t watch or participate.
It’s motivational for me, so I like it.
This post has been awesomely thought provoking.
Thanks!
i think food “sabotage” is acceptable in certain situation, especially at restaurants when they give you too large portions of food.
i heard this remark on TBL and was also thrown by it — it just seemed weird, like a sound bite was sliced together in the wrong moments.
Right on, sister 🙂 . it’s quite wateful to prepare too much food than you will consume. at home my momm ALWAYS makes enough food so we can have left overs. always. she started that when I turned to food to cope with my depression (give me better things to eat??) but recently I have gotten past that and been bombarded with the nagging question: why don’t you eat the left overs?. well thats because I don’t want to gain another 60 lbs. here in college, I can choose how much I want to eat. If I don’t want all of my soup, what ev. one of the teammates will finish it. if not, then it goes to compost.
This was one of my favorite of your posts. Im glad you pointed out that who we are is not what we eat or look like because somethimes even our well-meaning exercise/ health regimes get out of hand. Thanks for a good post
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