Interview anyone these days about food and no matter what their gastronomic predilections, chances are they will speak of them with a fervor bordering on religiosity. The vegan preaches her diet – nay, lifestyle in the truest sense of the word: it is not just food but an overarching style of life – with a proselytizing zeal reserved in earlier times for Christian missionaries in Africa. The low-carb Paleo follower punctuates his scientific claims with rhapsodic sermons about miracles although the results skew more towards reappearing abdominal muscles than healing leprosy. Consider the last time you were “preached” to about your diet. I’m betting it was fairly recent.
It seems almost impossible for people to talk about their food without invoking a larger meaning. I do not know anyone for whom food is simply sustenance. And perhaps it has always been this way; a cellular mechanism designed for survival in lean times. The colloquial term for this is food porn. And our infatuation with it is growing. If the proliferation of food blogs is any indication, then food has become the new sex and our obsession with regulating food, the new national religion.
Mary Eberstadt of the Stanford-based think tank the Hoover Institute, has noticed this change but in addition to the deifying of food she adds the secularization of that other great appetite: sex. In an interesting switch, food and sex have completely reversed their roles in society. And all within only a matter of two generations.
Think of it: what if humans were given access to limitless food and sex. The bottomless cup of hedonism, if you will. What does common sense dictate that we would do? Most would think we would become unrestrained in both areas, succumbing with equal glee to both gluttony and promiscuity. Yet for the first time in history we have a very large society in exactly this situation and the answer is not what anyone expected.
Eberstadt illustrates her point by using the example of Betty, a 1950’s housewife, and her contemporary granddaughter Jennifer summing up their attitudes by saying, “Betty thinks food is a matter of taste, whereas sex is governed by universal moral law; and Jennifer thinks exactly the reverse.”
There are many implications stemming from such a startling conclusion but one in particular has been weighing heavily on my mind: the idea of fat discrimination. While Eberstadt refrains from moralizing, I cannot help myself. If food is the new sex, meaning in the sense that our society has constructed strict mores about its consumption, followed by swift repercussions when those mores are broken, then publicly pillorying fat people is the modern equivalent of sending away a pregnant teen until her shame resolves itself. There is a new scarlet letter in town: it’s spelled XXL.
Take this picture currently making the Internet rounds:
I’ve come across this picture in at least 4 different occasions this weekend, each time under an increasingly insulting heading. It first showed up on Reddit under “If a single image ever stood for a generation…” and getting progressively worse as it made its way through various social media before ending up in the geek-chic clearing house of “cool” Google recommends, officially jumping the shark before it was even 48 hours cold.
What makes it so compelling? Certainly not that it is a picture of two obese people on a motorized scooter. Nothing inherently humorous is happening in the picture. But it certainly has the ability to garner attention. This, my friends, is the modern equivalent of the stocks. We have put this couple in the public eye, allowing the citizenry to bombard them with verbal stones as a punishment for their crime. Take some of the following comments, for example:
“There are three cows in this picture!” Immediately followed by, “Hey! Hey! Don’t insult bovines that way!”
“One word: Forklift”
“How do they f***?” Rejoinder: “Hopefully they don’t.” And the final crack: “They get mixed up with whose boob is whose.”
“Fake! -notice lack of BIG GULP cup holders -notice lack of Beef Jerky wrappers in fat folds -notice buildings and cow not leaning into their gravitational pull.”
And last but not least a plethora of Yo Mamma jokes, middle-school style.
So what is their crime? Being fat? Rather, being caught being fat. These people symbolize to our strangely moralistic-about-food society the sluts of gluttony. Not only can they not temper their appetites but they have the nerve to go out in public and flaunt their food-whorishness on a scooter. Picture instead of two heavies on a bike, a pregnant woman sans wedding ring. Would we ridicule her in such a manner? Would we teach our children to make jokes about her? The thought is absurd. Such a woman today would be entirely unremarkable – unless of course she managed to pop out eight babies at one time in addition to her other six. We mock them because we are so afraid of becoming them. And we fear them because being fat has become the worst sin you can commit today.
Which is worse these days: Being called fat or whore? If magazines are any indication, every woman in America would rather be known for being promiscuous than being a porker. Praise be to Nelly Furtado for making that distinction into a catchy little tune so we can all internalize it.
Happy Eating Disorder Awareness Week everyone!
It is funny how food and sex have swapped places!
Wouldn’t it be nice if we didn’t make judgments at all?
I think some of the moralizing comes from our own sense of struggle and temptation. If you want to have a lot of sex or eat a cheeseburger for lunch every day but feel like you “shouldn’t”, then how do you feel about others who go right ahead, never mind the consequences? It takes a mature person to stop judging others who live by different standards and worry instead about our own priorities. (Can’t say I’m always completely mature about that myself… )
“then food has become the new sex and our obsession with regulating food, the new national religion.” I agree completely, in the old age food was just a means to live, but now it is soo much more. It is like a religion, like sex and more for many people.
you said you don’t know anyone form whom food is just sustenance– my husband is one of those rare breeds. Since I am food obsessed (I am getting a Master’s in nutrition) this is a quality that is hard to understand in him– he will eat whatever and simply doesn’t care much about what it is.
The strangest thing about our collective hatred of obese people is that the overweight are the majority in this country. Talk about self-hatred! You would think all this abuse would stop us from getting larger every year as a nation but it doesn’t– more likely the self-hatred leads us all to eat more in a vicious cycle. Very disturbing.
I’ve been called both, repeatedly. The only time it ever hurt was when my brother called me fat at a family Christmas (he’s an insensitive jerk like that). Otherwise, personally, the words mean nothing to me. I throw “fat” around as something from my past…and hopefully never part of my future. I can’t comprehend obesity and the mindset (or lack thereof) of the morbidly obese.
I do feel annoyance for those groups of people referred to as fat and whores. Many are a drain on the economy and enviroment.
P.S. Oh goodness, whatever would’ve the 1950’s culture thought of an unmarried woman PURPOSELY impregnating herself with a turkey baster?
This post has made me think!
I’m obese and I feel sorry for these people. I know that their quality of life is poor and insulting and vilifying them doesn’t help at all!
I know of few societies that are crueller than America. In South Africa we would never catcall or riducule fat people in public. Or people who are different in any way. Individuality is prized here, not persecuted.
Nobody chooses obesity any more than people choose cancer or heart disease. The mechanisms of those conditions are all the same… it’s just the symptoms that vary.
The people in the picture, and the millions like them, need help, not insults!
Im married to sabrinas husband.
🙂
Ren Man is entirely normal mellow whatevs about food BUT he was raised in a very strict Christian family and came to me (wink) with some stuff I have unlearned for him.
this all has me wondering if we all HAVE TO HAVE A “thing” or can we raise kids sans issues.
food OR sex or whatever.
love,
a tangenting MIz.
Great post. I wonder if some of the gluttony perhaps stems from the earlier generation’s sexual repression? I find it very sad that the people in the picture are considered fair game. I have a hard time even watching a lot of disney flicks because of the token fat character that is the butt of the jokes the entire time. I can’t help it, the unfairness just glares at me now but I don’t even think I saw it when I was a kid despite being made fun of myself.
Interesting Charlotte. This makes me sad as I try REALLY hard not to comment on people’s body image since I was that fat girl back in the day.
However, whore doesn’t sit to well with me either…maybe it’s my Southern roots. Growing up in the Bible belt…lots of good Southern food, but no sex until marriage. 🙂
I think that fat has definitely become worse than whore in so many ways. But it’s also a shield. If you can call someone ELSE fat, you’re not. The same way that some of those girls in high school would throw the insults around – it meant that they weren’t THAT – fat, ugly, bitch, whore, none of it. If they could find someone else who was worse, they were fine.
So now you have people insulting the other, the fat one. As long as they can find someone fatter and worse off than they are, they’re safe.
Sorry for the slightly-off-topic rant/ramble.
A very sad , but accurate account of what is happening, Charlotte!
We were just discussing the other day about all the terms people use when describing their love of food, definitely, proving their feelings of “to die for,” as the truth.
It’s a shame that nothing seems to overcome the human will to persecute.
Interesting…
Hmm, I always thought it was food and religion that have swapped places. I guess it just depends on your point of view. I certainly think about food more than sex. Can’t say the same about the boyfriend, though. Haha!
Wow. I really enjoyed how that just completely shifted my perception of overweight folks… the new rebels aren’t the ones engaging in sex, drugs and rock and roll… that’s what everyone wants to be… reality tv, idol-type shows and our celeb addiction… Maxim, Cosmo and MTV are definately pro-slut, it is definately IN to know how to “please your man” in more kinky ways than one, there is even a lot of pressure if you are single to be quite versed in these areas… it hit me like a ton of bricks that the new rebels are the ones that can flaunt and accept their fatness and take it out on the streets, at the buffet, on the beach. I love it and I have a whole new respect for it. It’s incredible how judgemental we are towards “those fat people” in very much the same way we were with “promiscuous” women in the 1950s… what an eye opener. I know I fear being fat not beacue of health related issues but because of all the negative qualities we associate with fat ppl just like we did with promiscuous ppl back in the day (lazy, no displine or will power, sellout, weak, easy target, etc…). I want to succeed in life and part of my success (promotions, marriage, circle of friends) DOES (not saying i agree but DOES) depend on my appearance and the qualities that are associated with my appearance).
Why are we always so jealous and interesting in what “THEY” are doing? (THEY being the people who live in the moment, indulge in their hedonism cravings and don’t go through life thinking about “sacrifices for the greater good” and “restraint”… why don’t we just try to learn from them?
Spooky when people are on the same wavelength like this. I was just struck by the similarity between Scale Junkie’s description of binge eating and Shakespeare’s sonnet on lust. The expense of spirit in a waste of shame
Brilliant but brilliant post. I too, have often thought about this exact thing.
The “sluts of gluttony’. The crime truly is “being caught being fat”. These types of e-mail forwards absolutely sicken me. I received about 3 or 4 of these types forwards over the week end as well.
Friends on facebook with their continuous “linkage” to youtube videos of the “fat kid dancing”, or “granny breaks chair’. This saddens me.
The photo you’ve posted are of two individuals simply trying to go on with their day. They hear the snickers. They fear leaving their home. They’re not oblivious to how they appear. They’re trying to live, and have been ridiculed for doing so.
Why are there no forwards of “anorexic chick eating melba toast with knife and fork”?
Eye conversations with people in the locker room at the gym leave me wanting to scream at the top of my lungs. The protruding hip bones of one girl has me having a “poor thing doesn’t realize how skinny she is and should be out eating mcdonalds” moment with one woman. The next, an overweight woman trying to discretely slip on her swimsuit leads to a “I can’t believe she’d wear that in public” eye-attack from another.
What is this world coming to?
I’d rather be fat. But I’d be lying if I said I didn’t think about it for a while.
I guess a similar question would be: would you rather your S.O. gain 300 pounds or be intimate with someone else?
Oh Charlotte, AMEN, girl!!!!!!!!
I remember when The Straight Dope (a discussion board) was big, and there was an argument on their rant section about a fat person buying a doughnut. There were massive amounts of vitriole spewing forth about it, even though the poster had no idea what that person’s situation was (not that it matters).
I don’t recall ever seeing any kind of diatribe or heated discussion which centered around sex.
It’s such a sad commentary on our society that we feel the need to demonize what we fear. Instead of spending our energy ridiculing those we feel fall short of perfection we should instead be celebrating those who work towards a positive goal.
I agree that “food has become the new sex”, our obsession with food as a culture has become increasingly apparent.
Luckily for those of us trying for a positive fitness goal, healthy foods can be just as satisfying as good sex (well almost). Nothing beats a fresh ripe strawberry coated in a thin layer of rich dark chocolate ^_~
So crazy the way that’s happened. Our society is messed up.
It’s horrible how much we judge… and it’s worse when people have the gall to voice their judgments in a cruel fashion. Somehow, its still difficult to step in and tell people to have some respect… but I think that when we sit back and let other people pass judgment without saying anything, then we are just as guilty. Am going to make it my goal this week (to extend to next week and the week after etc) to make sure I step in- just like with the bystander thing that we were talking about last week.
Definitely food for thought in this post, Charlotte.
I have to agree with Crabby – wouldn’t it be nice if no-one judged anyone else? Unrealistic, but nice.
I truly feel sorry for those people – can you imagine the pain they feel, knowing that their picture has been plastered all over the internet, the target of such cruelty and the subject of so much discussion?
This brought to mind a photo that was the subject of an email I received a few years back – the photo was of an older, extremely emaciated woman wearing a bikini, with extremely sun-damaged skin, and a caption that referred to her as the Coppertone baby, all grown up. Equally as degrading as this one.
Yet another example of man’s inhumanity toward man.
(Oh dear, I certainly de-lurked with a vengeance, didn’t I? Guess you shouldn’t have mentioned sex….)
Food as the new sex…yeah, you have a good point there. One reason for the switch is the internet perhaps – it is much easier to pass around work safe pictures of obese people that stimulate a visual response than someone actively being a whore. Then, anyone from 90-900 lbs can call them fat on a post or a message board because they have anonymity – a very powerful thing. If you’ve dealt with any sort of internet customer service, you know that the equation of “normal person + internet + anonymity = jerkface” isn’t far off.
Yeah, I’m guilty of evangelizing the way I eat, simply because it’s worked to take down a bunch of weight and been a lot less painful than anything else I’ve ever tried, but I know that certain things work for some people and not others. It’s weird, my friends and I will now get drunk and talk about exercise and eating. Its odd.
I have a friend who food for him is just sustenance. He will eat anything and everything put in front of him, healthy or not. He also has the hottest burning metabolism I have ever witnessed. He is just as happy eating McDonalds, a salad, or a 100$ a plate dinner. Boggles my mind. My attitude is – I can only have so many calories, I want them to be epic (either in terms of nutritional value or satisfaction).
Good thought provoking post on a Monday!
Actually, I’ve noticed a lot of moral judgment around the issue of smoking too (like being fat). Although, it’s easier to hide smoking (as long as nobody gets close enough to smell the smoker–that’s a dead give-away).
There’s a real lack of compassion for certain kinds of addictive behavior. While alcoholism is generally accepted as a bona-fide addiction, those who overeat are seldom given the same understanding.
Intersting. Being “fat” might be the biggest sin today, but it’s funny because it’s also so common. What is it now, the average american woman is now how many pounds overweight?
Not being a history expert, but I bet the same thing was happening with the “whore” thing (well, loosely). Say, more sex before marriage and multiple partners was becoming more common at the same time that it had a bad label.
I always argue that fat is the last socially acceptable prejudice. If you made fun of someone for being, say, black, people would look at you with horror. But fat is “ok.”
In a total economist aside, Thorstein Veblen argued, a long time ago, that people are happy as long as they feel like they’re doing better than someone else. Fat is like that that… even if you’re fatter than you want to be, there’s always someone that you can feel superior to. Sex used to be like that (and still is in some circles). (Veblen was really talking about income, but the same idea works perfectly.)
It’s ugly and a poor reflection on us all.
Wow, I haven’t even thought of this concept, but it is so true. Incredible. You’re a great writer, Charlotte! Keep it up.
Fantastic post, Charlotte.
Thanks.
I love playing devil’s advocate:
Contempt and moral judgement is part of the human condition… it gives us a feeling of moral superiority, which is basically the same reason some people watch Springer and love reading tabloids. The “I’m not as messed up as those people” thought makes us feel a little better about our lives, which is basically the same as calling those people fatties or whores. In this specific instance, I think it’s an “at least I’m not as fat as those people” thought that almost everybody can jump aboard, even those that are overweight.
I know that morally judging is counterproductive since it’s just going to come back and bite me, but I’d be a hypocrite if I said I didn’t do the same, at least thoughtwise. I just try to keep it to myself. Maybe others aren’t so good at keeping it in.
About people for whom food is simply sustenence: I think a good proportion of males are this way. Females? I don’t think it’s possible 😛
Here’s another perspective: they’re not driving a gas-guzzler *and* they are scooter-pooling! Way to go! (Although, if that were me, I’d probably be wearing a helmet….)
Great post, as usual, Charlotte. Very thought-provoking, and there’s a lot I could say. In a nutshell, I’m with Crabby: wouldn’t it be nice if people didn’t make judgments? Especially those based solely on appearance? Not so long ago, I was morbidly obese. So was my husband. We each are essentially the same people on the inside as we were then, though.
Great post Char and great comments by your readers as usual. I agree that it’s not fair to judge and I think people find satisfaction in thinking, “at least I’m not as fat as them.”
I wanted to mention something I read in a magazine. They said that people are having sex less and less often and for shorter ammounts of time. They said now couples try and squeeze it in before a movie. Since when has watching a movie been more fun than sex? I guess when eating chocolate covered strawberrys did to.
The glorification of food is one that rivals the orgies of ancient Rome. The world around us has become wrapped up in excess and instant gratification. I’m sorry to report that this photo is just a sign of the times.
I totally agree, and this culture is getting out of control with it’s “fat moralizing”. I really am glad for the fat acceptance movement, not that I agree with all that they say, I’m glad it’s being said.
This is such a poignant post for me! I had a recent revelation that my eating has only gotten noticeably out of control since a certain time last year. Last summer I was in a short-lived but extremely passionate relationship. It was a mess. Definitely not healthy. I had never experienced such highs (and such lows) in what was intended to be a casual, light-hearted fling. In the 4 weeks post-break-up I gained about 8lbs… And that is the weight I have been trying to shift since then. I think I have been trying to replace sex with food!! No wonder I’m never satisfied!
This post has given me a lot to think about Charlotte… thanks… 🙂
I always assume people who are obese are like me when I was obese – uninformed, not very self-actualized and quite busy with other stuff/not prioritizing myself.
I guess empathy is a kind of judging also, but at least it’s gentler. I just think “That was me/That could be me.” Because we’re all human and not very different at all.
Oh, how painfully true!
Think of how many commercials, particularly those marketed to women, show an actress almost having an orgasm over whatever food she’s marketing…
I wonder what would happen if we were just allowed to eat our damn food, no matter what it is, in peace–without it being painted as either appalling OR sexy.