Now, if I’d only had these babies…Like many of my ideas gone awry, it seemed like a good plan at the time. First, it involved walking on a beautiful day and that alone can mitigate many a bad consequence. Second, walking is a time honored bipedal tradition – and one I’m learning to embrace more fully as a legitimate fitness method (Charlotte to Brain: “It is TOO a workout! Shut UP!!”). And lastly, many fitness experts backed up by current research extol the salutary effects of walking. You know I’m a sucker for anything involving research and experts.
Besides, all I needed to do was walk home from my church, a distance just over 4 miles. How could I go wrong with walking?
Problem 1: Footwear. Many of you chimed in over at Cranky Fitness’ insightful and interesting post on what is the deal with women wanting beauty to the exclusion of almost anything else – including comfort. She ‘fessed up to being a lifelong tomboy and I then had to admit to a horrifically stereotypical female adoration of all things girly. Especially tall shoes. And today’s sassy little spring dress called for an adorable-yet-still-aware-of-the-chilly-weather boot. Namely these:
(No, I wasn’t wearing a different color on each foot. I own the brown ones thank you very much.) With the built-in platform, these babies are 5-inch stiletto heels. Cute but not definitely not up to a 4-mile power walk. (In fact, if I’m being completely honest, they’re barely up to hobbling around indoor spaces for any length of time greater than an hour.) I contemplated my options, roaming my church building for anyone I might know who could give me a ride as I’d had to stay late for a meeting and sent my long-suffering husband home ahead of me with all the children. No rides in sight and hitchhiking not a good option, I decided to just strip off the boots, stuff them in my backpack and walk home. Barefoot.
I was even excited about the prospect as barefoot walking is supposed to be one of the new health crazes (crazies?) and the way home is quite picturesque. Besides, what could be more idyllic than a girl in a spring dress wandering barefoot through the dandelions? I felt like a Monet come to life.
For about the first half mile. Turns out that dandelions are very prickly and lawns in my suburban neighborhood are actually very sparse in comparison to the vast amounts of concrete and asphalt. You think running on concrete/asphalt is hard on your body? Try walking on it. By two miles the soles of my feet were in so much pain that I briefly considered going native and trying to weave myself a pair of sandals… out of plastic bags, fast food wrappers and – most strangely – a Swine Flu mask that I found on the side of the road. (Seriously, what up with the litter Lakeville??)
By mile three I knew I could go no more. My feet burned and my toes were swollen and I was stepping in such a weird way that I’m pretty sure my calves will be in mutiny tomorrow. Stupid boots. Who wears non-functional footwear? Scratch that, who wears non-functional feet?! What is wrong with my pampered tootsies that they can’t even take a four-mile jaunt across sidewalks and lawns? Dejected, I dropped my crazy-heavy backpack and plopped down on top of it, leaning up against the street sign between a lube shop, a Pizza Hut and a motel of a dubious nature. Which is when I realized I’d gone from Girl Walking in Flowers to Girl Doing Apparent Walk of Shame (except I’m already knocked up so it’s like twice the shame!).
I called my husband from my cell phone. “Look honey…” He was worried, “What did you do now?” I hung my head. “I’m just down the street but you’re going to have to pile all the kids in the car and come pick me up. Literally. As in you might have to carry me to the car.” After what seemed like an inordinate amount of time to drive a mile – during which I was amused by Turbo Jennie’s texted adventures in Wal-Mart and the honking of several cars – my family arrived with the two-year-old hoisting a “rescue flag” out the window (handy had I been in an avalanche).
Having spent the rest of the day limping around my house and wincing everytime I stepped on a cheerio, I think I have learned my lesson. And that would be to never trust a researcher wearing shoes. No wait, it would be to always carry a pair of flip flops. Actually, what I learned is that things that sound good in the lab don’t always translate very well to real life.
Any of you ever had to hike in ridiculously inappropriate shoes? Or, like Cranky, do you refuse to suffer for fashion? Anyone else wander barefoot and pregnant through their city streets this weekend?
You crack me up! I can just picture the hubby picking you up and the flag…pure genius. My hubby would appreciate his sense of humor.
Alas…I used to wear shoes to look good…the heck with comfort. Until I broke my ankle and it required surgery. Now one ankle is considerably more swollen than the other and strappy things just don’t work. Now, sadly, I’m all about comfort. And I say sadly because I really like some of my shoes from before.
And I’ve NEVER been able to wear those cute boots. I have HUGE calves that never fit in shoes like that. 🙁
My husband is a podiatrist and the same height I am. I gave up on cute heels a long time ago. I did forget to change my shoes at Disney World and wore my flip flops to the park instead of my more supportive and less-stylish sneakers. Yeah, blisters and aching calves are not convenient when you have three days left at Disney World.
Soak those tootsies!
Oooh girl, you shoulda called me. I only had one baby to strap into the car. Probably would’ve gotten there quicker than the hubby:)
As I’m sure everyone who sees me knows, I do not believe in suffering for fashion. Clothes, shoes, underwear…doesn’t matter. If they aren’t comfy, I’m not wearing them. Period.
When I was 15 I decided that I would be cool and not wear socks with my wannabe Doc Martins. Then walk to the store that took an hour. Now days if I’m going for a few days of hiking or walking I bring several pairs of shoes and socks. 🙂
I love your posts! LOL! Is it too weird that my feet ache with anything NOT involving (at least) 4-inch-heels? I only wear flat shoes while working out(only for obvious reasons) and even then I think I’d be more comfortable if they were taller… bah.
My feet don’t like me being 5’4.
you make me GIGGLE as well.
I cant do those shoes.
dont much do heels (I will break out the wedge platforms once in a blue moon)either.
have you tried on the VIBRAM 5 FINGERS? I do love me some those…the closest I will ever get to barefoot running or walking.
That’s such a hilarious story! I loved the contrast between your idyllic Monet version of the walk and the tortured reality.
I’ve always been a tenderfoot, even as a kid. When all my pals were running around barefoot I’d try to join in but I never seemed to build up enough callouses to make it anything but painful.
Sure, five minutes on a soft sandy beach is great… but other than that, I think shoes are one of the best human inventions ever!
My shoes are usually uncomfortable because they are cheap – especially dress shoes. I battle between comfort and economy. My hubby shakes his head at me every time. 🙂 Charlotte, will you please call me or walk to my house from the church next time?
Haha, your child is well on his way to smart-aleckness. Excellent.
My husband and I used to live in Bellevue, WA (right outside of seattle). There are lovely little parks with walking trails all over the city and we would spend an hour or two walking in them quite frequently. On his birthday one year, husband wanted to do a “day hike.”
I’d hiked before, but never called them “day hikes.” I thought a day hike meant “hiking during the day” as opposed to camping out and packing in your food. Well, day hike evidently means hiking all darn day long. I wore flip-flops thinking that it would be like our leisurely walks through the local park. I made it up the mountain and back, but it was a 5 hour hike in inappropriate footwear. That’s the last time I’ll do that. 😀
I have a wonderful memory of walking barefoot between the Lincoln Memorial, and the Washington Monument to the Capital building along that great Mall! Seeing that beautiful expanse of green grass, I took my shoes off, stepped off the path most traveled, and walked that green carpet 🙂
I also have had some walks as you have that didn’t turn out quite so well 🙁
Thanks for another great Monday morning read, Charlotte!!
So I’ve never walked barefoot, but I have run barefoot. But only on the track, and my coach preferred that we do it on the infield, in it’s artificial turf softness. The idea is that running barefoot strengthens your feet, making them less prone to injury and more efficient, but you don’t just run miles barefoot, we worked up to a mile or two cool down after a workout.
cute shoes are the bane of my existence. especially as a runner. My Coach flats give me wicked blisters on my heels within 4 minutes making it painful to run. My heel s can make me vulnerable to planter facitis (sp?). But yet I love them and will always wear them
Lisa – Yes, my husband has an excellent sense of humor. Which is probably the only that has saved us through 4 1/2 kids;) I’m sorry about your ankle! I’d be mourning the loss of my heels too!
Wettsteins – Having a podiatrist husband would probably have made me more sensible too! Ouch to Disney land tho:(
Aboyn3girls – And yet you STILL manage to look darling! You must teach me in your ways of function AND fashion;)
omg you WERE barefoot and pregnant – how cliche! I can’t imagine what it felt like and what would’ve been worse – what you did or wearing the (sexy) knee-high stilettos. A-plus for effort, tho.
Anon – I’m imagining your blisters! No wonder you have a sock fetish now:)
Angie – I’m kinda the same way! I’m 5’7″ and yet in my mind I’m much much taller so I think the shoes are just a logical extension of my sense of self,lol!
Miz – The Vibrams make me giggle every time I look at them. But I just can’t wear them. Keens are about as close as I’ll get to so-ugly-they’re-fun shoes!
Crabby – I KNOW! Beach walking is like strolling on an emery board. Sure it’s nice to get your calluses rubbed off but after a few minutes it just hurts.
Shellie – Ooh girl, we gotta go shopping together. I can help you find some quality (comfy!) shoes for cheap!! I’m like a savant. Seriously.
Elizabeth – I used to live in Edmonds!! So fun to have another Seattle-ite here! And there are so many lovely places there to leisurely walk. Day hiking in flip flops tho? Yikes!
Dr. J – What a beautiful picture you paint!
Hollyn – Oooh, I wish you hadn’t told me that heels can lead to plantar fascitis! (Okay so I could have guessed but still…) I’m like you, I don’t wear them every day but I can’t give them up completely! And I am SO interested in your training sessions now… professional athletes intrigue me. Glad you worked out the barefoot running!
I used to wear heels all the time. I wore them for 2 hours on friday, and my feet ached for 2 days.
I’m legitimately worried, as this trend needs to be reversed before I walk down the aisle (I know I’ve got over a year, but still…).
I think it’s funny that the visions we conger up when trying something so simple on a spring sunny day comes from the idealist mind of Norman Rockwell and his Saturday Evening Post covers. The days are always wonderful in the world he painted and a walk in bare feet would be to the “fishin hole”. Of course the reality is, calf high boots with 5 “ stiletto heels, real ground with brambles, pricker bushes and buried things and thinking that a four mile walk in bare feet with just a quick trip. Thanks for the wake up Charlotte.
Oh, how you make me laugh. I’m pretty much a slave to comfort, especially after I had a job where I had to wear uncomfortable pants and shoes and Spanx. Okay, I chose to wear the Spanx, it wasn’t company policy.
I go barefoot as much as possible but, seeing as I’m a big ol’ wuss, that tends to be either indoors, on soft, well-tended grass, or sand (as long as it’s not too hot). I also avoid heels. I’m 5’9″, Hubby is 5’5″ (and LOVES it when I do wear heels-weirdo), and I just can’t walk around on those pointy little things.
Hm. I guess it’s no coincidence that two of my fave workouts (pilates and yoga) are done barefoot.
Hee hee, I am feeling your pain! My husband offered to carry me to the car from a party last month. I thought I had found some comfy/cute heeled shoes to wear. Wrong. I gave up and went barefoot the last two blocks. The next day I wished I had swallowed my pride and let him carry me!
I am constantly in the comfort vs. fashion shoe quandary. Pre-kids I was always in heels. I am 5’8″, and was forced to wear flats to many a prom (can’t be taller than your date). I got to college and figured, screw it, I like being tall! Then I fell in love with my 6’2″ hubby (for other reasons than his height-its a bonus) and could wear all the heels I wanted. Then I had kids, and I blame my current feet-pain issues on all those baby hormones.
I am headed to Vegas for our 10th anniversary trip next week and am trying to figure out how to work the comfy/cool quandary. Where do you find your quality/comfy/cool shoes for cheap?
I thought walking around Baltimore in my supposedly-comfy 4″ heel boots was a good idea…at first.
Ditto for Chicago in a blizzard in 3.5″ stiletto boots. Not only were my feet hurting like something awful, but they were also numb cold. Being a Chicagoian, you’d think I would know better (I don’t–I’ve worn sandals in the snow before).
During the summer I do my best to walk barefoot when I can. Always in my home, and short jaunts outdoors (although I temporarily don flip flops for the walk through the apartment complex hallway in between my place and the parking lot. The idea of walking barefoot on that fuzzy petri dish skeeves me out!)
I’m getting over tendonitis in one foot and I’ve noticed walking around in my apartment barefoot feels better than wearing slippers or flip flops.
YIKES! Are you any better??? How long will the recoup take? OUCH!
Well, my feet are sooooooo flat, wide AND with bunions that I can't even fit in any of the cute shows out there & now I want to because I can't wear anything except workout shoes or my feet hurt PLUS they don't fit in anything anyway! Good thing I am not working outside the house!
Your story cracked me up & reading you is like living it. I don't want to laugh but I do…. but honestly, I sure hope you are better soon!
i can hardly make it down the driveway barefoot…
Barefoot walking (and even running which I do sometimes) is great, but you didn’t work up to it. You can’t expect to go out and do 4 miles first time. Also on concrete? Not the best idea. No calluses no adaptation,no nothing.
I own a pair of Vibram 5 fingers and love em. Overly engineered running shoes are probably responsible for as many injuries as they supposedly prevent. Kind of like over use of weight machines the “natural movement” that nature would like us to do is taken away. Dos that make me a renaissance man?
I feel your pain but damn, those boots are smoking hot! I bet you look amazing in them. Are they your ‘go-to’ footwear when you want to look a million bucks?
Those boots are the hotness! But yeah – they look painful to walk on for an extended period of time.
I try to go for the best of both worlds. I wear mostly platform-y/wedge-y sandals which are comfy enough for most non-fitness activities and stylish enough to make me feel like I am not running around in tennies or flip flops. I do have one magical pair of knee high platform boots that are just about as comfy as tennies and only cost me 11 bucks. Yeah. Wish I had bought 10 pairs of em.
Four miles though? That’s a pretty good hike. I’m impressed you made it so far! 🙂
I love me some cute shoes, and I LOVE those boots! But geez, Charlotte, 4 miles on concrete? Ouch. I have feet of steel, and even *I* wouldn’t do that. Seriously. I walk barefoot on the asphalt outside when it’s 100 degrees out and it doesn’t bother me, but a 4-mile hike makes my feet hurt just THINKING about it. Yeesh.
LOL! Love the story, Charlotte! Although I am sorry that your poor feet got beat up so badly and you had to be rescued!
I did a 4 mile “walk of shame” after being ditched by my “friends” after a night of drinking in my early 20’s. We were partying at some guys trailer, whom I did not know, but one of my friends did, and I ended up getting very drunk, passing out and apparently refusing to be moved by anyone.
I woke up on the couch at 6 AM with no friends in sight and some fat dude snoring on the other couch. (Yeah, I realize the scariness of the situation!) I panicked and couldn’t get a hold of anyone to pick me up.
So, I stole a Harley Davidson sweatshirt that was laying in this trailer of wonder, and started my trek home with messy hair, smeared makeup and wearing the stolen sweatshirt and my own straw American Eagle sandals…
After 1 mile, my feet started bleeding… so I took my shoes off and went the rest of the way barefoot. I actually didn’t find the barefoot part too painful, but maybe it was because the other option would just rub my raw, bloody foot skin more!
I finally made it home, and no, I don’t hang out with those “friends” anymore! It was a crappy situation, but it makes for an interesting story now!
Sheesh, Charlotte!! The expression is “barefoot and pregnant in the KITCHEN!!!!!!” Not hiking 4 miles on pavement!
The boots are darned cute, though. How I long for the days when I could wear things like that instead of the stupid orthopedic things I’m stuck with now that I’m old.
After several pairs of adorable, yet rediculously uncomfortable, pairs of sandles gave me multiple blisters (some even to the point of popping) I vowed to only wear comfortable shoes. If they’re cute, bonus, but nothing is worse than foot pain. Ok, maybe losing a limb. But, nothing short of losing a limb is worse than foot pain!
Besides, I’m 5’7″. I feel rediculous at 6′ tall, especially when my hubby is 6′ even.
If you’re so lucky to still be in your growing years, then there’s tons of stuff you can do to increase your height in a natural way.
I’ve spent entire summers barefoot. By the end of the summer your feet have incredible calluses. A five mile walk on pavement was no big deal. This doesn’t work too well in an urban setting where broken glass is pretty much everywhere.
You need to work up to that 4 mile hike in bare feet.
Barefoot soccer is fantastic, but if everyone isn’t barefoot broken toes are an occupational hazard. Oh well.
I grew up running barefoot on rock driveways, with those horrid horse chestnut trees growing all over my yard. I loveded running on the road barefoot too, but as I’ve gotten older my feet have become accustomed to shoes. I still prefer flip flops in the summer, and something easy to put on in the winter. My husband is constantly laughing at me because I wear backless/slip on shoes in the 3 feet of snow. I’m not worried about style. I don’t currently own heels… I’d rather go barefoot. 🙂
I am a barefooter. I have ugly, hardened, calloused feet that I cringe when I get pedicured (1) because I feel bad for the poor lady who has to work with those and 2) because she’s shaving off all of my hard work and making my feet tender and soft again). I love how strong my feet are and how much they can endure. I rarely if ever wear socks. I live in northern canada and during the winter, I function in a plain pair of moccassins (I pack heels for work). During the non-snowy months (it can still be super cold, just no snow), I rely on ballet-type slippers, no cushoning, no fancy ankle support, just something that contains my feet and prevents glass or other road objects from cutting my feet. I also run with my Vibram Five Fingers. The only time I will wear something with a bit more “padding” is if I am backpacking with 40+lbs on my back for extended periods of time and in rough terrain (mountainous, jagged rock structure, slippery, all-weather). I know this NOW only because I decided to do a 56K hike last summer with 40lbs on my back across Lake Superior Provincial Park… with only a pair of Vibrams last summer and severely regretted it. Toughening your feet to that degree requires months if not years of living barefoot full-time… It really is a baby steps kind of thing but once you can run barefoot nothing is more fun or freeing…
Within my circle of friends I am the proud owner of the largest quantity of inappropriate footwear. I am the person that gets called for appropriately girly shoes that are only useful for walking from car to dinner or going to a house party because you’ll take them off. I walked 1Km in my 4″ MicroSuede Steve Madden sling back peep toes last week and I have the blisters to prove it. Would I give them up? No way. Do I pack sneakers in my car? Hell Ya.
July 2007 – I was in Nevada for a wedding, and the day started with me telling my boyfriend I needed to go to Wal-Mart for some stuff….5 hours later we were walking through Zion National Park (yes, in Utah) and I was wearing 1 inch high heels/thong style. Went a lot easier once I decided just to remove my shoes.