Let’s be clear: this is not my baby. If it were, there would have been twice as much tape plus a couple of pairs of scissors, some contraband Halloween candy and a spare brother or two caught in there as well.Five Great Things About Having a One-Week-Old Baby
5. The explosion of pink! It’s like a Pepto Bismol factory vomited all over my house. And I love it. Let’s face it, I needed a little estrogen backup around here.
4. Having my husband home all week. Not only did he entertain the three boys marvelously but he also caught up on a bunch of home improvement projects. I have curtains again! (No thanks to the Tarzan-monkeys that pulled them all down in the first place. You know that phrase “hanging from the chandeliers”? It’s not just a colloquialism at our house. That has literally happened. And yes, the chandelier came right out of the ceiling. They don’t make ’em like they used to! Chandeliers, that is, not kids. As far as I know kids are still made exactly like they used to be. No, I’m not giving you instructions so don’t ask. ANYHOW.)
3. Finding out how many people love us. I am still overwhelmed by all the gifts, meals, phone calls, e-mails and other acts of kindness that have come our way. (Truth to be told, I’m feeling a little undeserving. But grateful! Very, very grateful.)
2. I’m not pregnant anymore! I can see my feet! No more heart burn! I can put on pants like a normal human being again (well, I would be able to if normal pants fit yet.) If I suck in really hard I can imagine I have a waist again! Plus, my rack is awesome. Yeah, I said it. Seriously, this is so exciting for me that I would have put it as number one except that nothing trumps…
1. My sweet little baby! She is the squishiest, cutest, cuddliest, yummy-smellingest, most adorable, best baby ever! (You know, except for my previous three. What? Someday they are going to learn how to read and we all know Google is Forever.)
Five Not-So-Great Things About Having a One-Week-Old Baby 1. It turns out they can all be condensed into one bad thing: anxiety. Sure, I could whine about multiple night feedings, my kangaroo stomach, my milk letting down every 3 hours on the dot (tingly!) and everything else that comes with caring for a post-partum body and a new infant but really these things don’t bother me much. At least not compared to the hanging-by-my-fingernails post-partum anxiety.
I’ve written before about how my version of the “baby blues” entails obsessive worrying and panic attacks – called post-partum panic/anxiety disorder – and how it gets worse with every child. I knew this was coming so I wasn’t surprised by the heart palpitations and racing thoughts (5th time’s the charm!). I think I’m dealing with it pretty well – I spend a lot of time meditating, talking myself down and basking in the atomic glow of my Happy SAD Light – but it doesn’t make it any less uncomfortable. With my last baby it seemed to peak at about 2 weeks post-partum and get better from there. I’m hoping for a similar arc with this one. In the meantime, thanks to all of my friends and family members that have babysat me in the evenings this past week!
Of course one of the hardest parts of this PPA is that I still can’t use my primary coping mechanism: exercise. Now that I’m feeling much better after the birth, I’m anxious (ha! get it?) to return to real workouts and not just walking. But I know if I start too much too soon my body will slap me down like a WWF wrestler except instead of a chair over the head it will be mastitis (wow, just using that word makes me feel like a cow.)
Reader Rachel wrote to me a while ago asking what my post-partum exercise plan was. Here it is: not get sick. As we all learned from the infamous mice-on-mini-treadys studies, exercise in moderation boosts your immune system but too much makes you sicker than none at all. I started several days after her birth with just some seriously slow walking. Now that we’ve passed the one-week mark I plan on upgrading that to moderate walking and yoga. Week three I’m adding in some weights. I’m making myself wait to do anything hardcore like TurboKick until a month. Running we’ll just have to wait and see as my hips are still completely disconnected and have the nasty habit of going in opposite directions when I walk.
What is your advice for coming back from a long exercise hiatus? Even if you’ve never been pregnant, almost everyone has had to work back from an injury, illness, surgery or other life event! Anyone else get post-partum anxiety?
Yay! Baby : )
If you don't trust your judgment, I would share your training plan with a trusted advisor (thank goodness you have the gymbuddies!) and see if they think you are overextending yourself. I'm thinking for the first 6 weeks less (not NONE) is better than more. besides, in the long run, is it really mandatory that your body is back to prepreg shape immediately — 'cause you know we love you just as you are : )
I love that picture!!
I usually last a week or 2 after having a baby before the panic of the weight has me out running. And usually am hit with mastitis by week 8. Between my 4 boys I've lost track of the number of times I've had it. But I just can't seem to allow myself to relax and take it easy. I've told myself each time that I'll wait a little longer to start working out but honestly I feel fine and start to get antsy almost as soon as I get home. It's a vicious cycle!
Back when my babies were babies, I just worried about sleeping and making sure I bathed them each day (forgot with #1 for a few days and felt like I was a failure). I did not worry about exercise for a few months until I was tired of baggy clothes and they were sleeping a bit.
So glad that she is here and you are going well. Our neighbor just had a baby girl on the 3rd and their house is exploding pink too (we added to the explosion today).
Kamboja – Such a good point! My judgement is totally not trustworthy. I will discuss with Gym Buddies ASAP!
Niki – How glad am I that you commented?! Seriously, you sound just like me & it's nice to know that other moms do the same things I do. I totally feel now like I could jump right back into exercise but the mastitis always is a reality check (and a really painful one!)
VAmomof2 – Wait, you have to bathe them every day?? I totally don't do that. Mother of year, that's me!
So excited to hear from you!
I remember after my first baby thinking the "take it easy" stuff didn't apply to me. Plus I was so excited to take my beautiful new baby for a walk in our shinny new stroller. I was shocked when after one block my body revolted and I barely made it home. It sucked. I am no good at "taking it easy".
Right now I am freaking out/anxious because I hurt my wrist (playing with my little monkeys) and it is taking FOREVER to get my strength back.
I think I might have to cave in and actually try yoga again. I have a hard time with the "just hold the position and breathe" stuff. I need to be moving to get relief from my anxiety.
bjbella- I know exactly what you mean! I went to Home Depot to buy lightbulbs 2 days after she was born and was walking like a 70-year-old after a hip replacement by the time I got back out to the car.
Good luck with the yoga! You know I love it:))
One gym buddy to another….If you show up in Turbo after one month, I'm gonna roundhouse your butt!!! That is too soon for that class…bite the bullet and take BodyVive for pity's sake…but NO turbo. Gym buddy's (with 4 kids) ORDERS!
It's so great to hear that you totally get it about the need to come back slow. I know how eager you must be to get back to your regular routines! But sounds like taking care of yourself is a higher priority, and you are not exactly known for being lazy and unmotivated.
Sorry to hear about the anxiety; good that you know your patterns so you know that when it gets bad, it's about anxiety and not reality. Still sucks though; hope that part is over soon!
Love that pic! I would probably do that to a screaming kid! 🙂
Charlotte, sounds like you know your trigger points & have a plan of attack! Good for you!!!
It is always hard coming back from a lay off. I really have not had anything major but a couple things where I had to be off a couple weeks. I just go back in slowly to my routine & up the intensity based on how I feel & of course if there are docs orders. I have been at this long enough to know my bod but like you, I am always wanting to do too much. Take it slow & don't injure "anything" 😉
Did I miss the name of new baby girl???
Thx for the bday wishes!
Please stay clear of all grocery stores. ATHANKYA! 🙂
Welcome back!! I would imagine you've got YOUR hands full!!
I'm just the observer who will learn from the rest of you gals 🙂
hooray for the cute baby!
After injury (which I guess labor and delivery is, actually) make sure to ease back into exercise. Get a trainer or buddy to be responsible for keeping you from overdoing it. If someone is holding you responsible for your gym antics, you might be less prone to overdoing it.
I am still dealing with post partum anxiety and my youngest child was born 5.5 years ago…
I would think you know your body well enough to ease back into things. But then again, after my c-section, I was off the heavy duty meds after a few days so I could drive myself to a dance class so maybe advice from me is not the best!
Congrats on your baby girl!
YAYAYAYAYAYAYA! You're back!
I myself have no children, but I find that I have awful post partum anxiety for my sister. (She had her baby girl last Thursday!)
In fact, when she called to tell me she was born I was excited to hear the baby details, but more worried about my sister. Her first delivery was awful, and I was hoping this one was much better. It was, but I'm still worried sick over her all day. Just on Saturday she said "If the next delivery would go as well as this one has, I'll be ready to try for another one in a year!" Sounds like I shouldn't worry so much! I can only imagine how bad I'll be when I have a baby.
I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers that this anxiety does not stick around for long. And I'm so happy that you're loving the excess of pink! 🙂
I'm just glad you're back in blogland — I missed you! Plus, now I know not to swing from the chandeliers unless I'm at someone else's house.
Ummm, wow, I am shocked that you had the time to write a post within a week of having a baby! I was totally expecting a least a month or two of hiatus. I even made plans to go back and read archives….
I have no suggestions on getting back into working out, but how in god's name do all those celebs lose baby weight within a month if it's hard to just walk due to hip dislocation?? I don't understand, and I hate them even more for the inaccurate portrayal of life. Seriously, wtf?
I'm so glad you're enjoying your daughter, and I really hope your anxiety keeps it's previous schedule and you'll be feeling better in a couple weeks….
Oh, and does the light give you a headache? My parents got me a visor one when I lived in Montreal, and I found I could only use it for 30m at a time without getting a headache. Now that I'm in Calgary, lack of sun isn't a huge problem….but in Montreal I was dying.
I got it. I know, that sounds weird, but it’s true; dad’s get it, too. Probably not nearly as bad as mom’s get it, but it’s there to some degree. It can be as simple as not feeling welcome or appreciated because all the attention is falling on someone else from their spouse, to full on depression. I’m somewhere in between there. It wasn’t so much with the first one, but this time around it was worse; I think it had more to do with being a single parent to a two-year-old while they were both in the hospital. Combine that with the utter despair of said child in the NICU and the feeling that there is absolutely nothing you can do. Period. Many people don’t realize that NICUs are an isolation tank; in the more serious cases, like ours was this second time, you can’t talk to the baby, you can’t touch the baby, you can’t stimulate the baby at all. If you do, the baby overreacts and starts shaking, convulsing, bradying, ceasing to breathe. It’s that utter despair of helplessness that leads to anxiety.
-Joshua
Love your gym buddy who's going to keep you out of turbo! Congratulations on the new little one, and it's great to hear that you're both healthy & happy. No kids, but plenty of hormone-related anxiety . . . and for that, it sounds like you're doing everything right. I'm coming back to serious exercise and here's my hard won 2 cents — treat that body nicely! I overdid the hiking, and I'm like a broken puppet – bad plantars, bad hip flexor, bad back. All I had to do to prevent this was keep up with my yoga, but did I? Nooo, I got all nutty & hiked harder. Your tendons, cartilage – all of which are loosened up in childbirth – need to last your entire life. Be good to your joints now, and your forty year old self will so appreciate being able to walking up and down stairs without using both handrails. Or stand from a sitting position without pushing off 😉 Off to do some yoga, here. Slooowwwwly. Take care.
I'm glad you're taking it easy 🙂
I've no kids so I have no advice on that part, but I've friends who eased back into things with walking and yoga. I agree with the others…perhaps having a gym buddy to cut you off will keep you from overdoing it. You've got some major healing to do, and the easier you take it, the faster you'll heal.
I'm always in awe of mom's and new babies. 🙂 So happy for you .
It seems I was inflicted with post-swine-flu anxiety! I went down with the flu, hard, two weeks ago and everyday I would look at my husband with snot dripping out of nose, cold beads of sweat on my forehead, and day-quil on my breath asking, "Do you think I can work out today?"
He forced me to take the week off and honestly it was the best thing I could have done. I started with a day of walking, then a walk jog, then by the following Monday I was in the gym pumping iron per the usual.
I have no idea how to deal with the anxiety (or the aftermath of birthing a child). Day/Ni-quil worked for me…give it a whirl? 🙂
With my first, I was in survival mode for the first eight weeks so any sort of workout that didn't involve a stroller was out of the question. However, now that I'm an old "pro" at the baby thing, I'm really hoping to be back in the gym at two weeks, even if it's just walking on the treadmill and some light lifting. I'm not sure when I'll start running again, whether it's at that 2 week mark or 2 months.
Are you using the Taut wrap? I'm really curious how it's going to work out for you.
Hooray little one! I'm not all about the pink myself, but it's always nice to have some estrogen back up, right?
I have no experience with pregnancy nor true anxiety attacks, but I've had my share of injuries. It sucks, but I always err on the side of caution. Spending 12 years with weak ankles because I had a "slap some tape and shoot some advil and go" gymnast mentality taught me well…
you crack me up. i just sent your blog to my friend that works at a literary agency cause i think you should write a book- it probably doesn't even matter what it's about.
about the whole postpartum thing- i highly recommend hypnotherapy for stress relief and hormonal balance. course i'm biased since i'm a hypnotherapist but it works really well and it's natural so it's good for you and the baby. you can see someone live if you have a recommendation or you can just buy a cd online. i love bellaruth naparstek, not her name so much, but her voice is very soothing. enjoy your sweet baby!
Well I've only had the one kiddo, but I did get some crazy anxiety after she was born. I'm not usually an anxious person, so I'm not accustom to anxiety or panic attics. Not a fan at all! It took a few months to go away, but I did eventually go back to normal. Phew!
Now exercise…For the first week I walked about 2-3 miles a day (slowly). By the second week I was walking and doing a half hour on the stationary bike (also very slowly). I stuck with that for the first six weeks. I had an emergency C-section so the doc didn't want me running or doing anything too rigorous. But even if I could have ran, I don't think I would have felt like it. The other exercise was more gentle and enough to keep me from feeling crazy.
Oh, BTW, congrats on your baby girl!
Congratulations on your new baby girl! Whoop Whoop for the estrogen!
My best advice would be the get massage. Nothing-nothing is more calming, grounding, and relaxing then being touched in a nurturing way. Ask one of your lovies, or ask them to babysit while you see a professional massage therapist.
Yay! I'm glad you're back, and glad you're taking it slow! I will send you anti-anxiety vibes riiiiiiight . . . NOW. There. Did you feel that? No? Drat. I'll keep working on it. 😉
Charlotte,
So good to hear you and the family are doing well. Never come back from a pregnancy, but I did bruise my sacrum, had a stress fracture in my pubic bone, pulled 2 groin muscles, and strained my hamstring. Had to lay off anything impact for a while with all my injuries. Pool running saved me. Boring as anything but a GREAT WORKOUT!
So with all my mastitis and plugged ducts I have absolutely nothing to add here… per the anxiety, I dunno. I'm feeling a dose myself now 9 months later… can't figure out if it's the darker days or a resurgence of hormones or both. But one thing that did help this weekend was to get a grip: what I perceive as problems really aren't problems. I harkened back to that photo of the woman in Africa you posted. Sometimes a little perspective helps me bounce back.
mother of MERCY I *do* need a goooooooooogle reader. I had no idea you were bad.
sad sad sad.
off to catch up.
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LOL – looks like that kids older brothers are practicing or Frosh week! Being small, I was taped to the wall more times than I can count!
PPA – I think I actually crossed over from PPA to PPD. Four years later and I'm still trying to get rid of it – exercise helps immensely but is not always possible because my husband spends 1/2 the year in another continent.
Congrats on the baby and good luck!
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