All I want right now is a big frosty glass of creamy, ice-cold milk. And I don’t even like milk! So why the sudden cravings? No, I’m not pregnant (aiiieeee!) and no it wasn’t the siren call of Heidi Klum’s milkmaid campaign working on my addled brain. It’s deprivation, plain and simple. What’s the fastest way to get someone to eat something? Tell them they can’t have it, of course!
Over the past few weeks I have discovered through much trial and error that the Jelly Bean does not do well when I eat dairy products. We tried more thorough burping (exactly as fun as it sounds), reflux medicine (have you tried giving an infant medicine??) and everything from simethicone drops to gripe water to acidophilus to lactaid to help with her apparent stomach pain and prodigious vomiting. Little girl has earned her “volcano” nickname and I’ve probably been banned from the grocery store, for all the trails of bodily fluids she has left in our wake. It’s like Hansel and Gretel, if Hansel and Gretel were both blast-ended skrewts.
The worst part, naturally, is that I have to keep a bib on her at all times thereby covering up all her adorable little girly outfits! We all have our trials to bear, I know.
After all of that drama, I finally decided it was time to turn my attention to my diet as Jelly Bean is almost exclusively breastfed. (The almost is because she has taken a bottle of formula exactly thrice from the patient childcare staff at the gym and has since refused to replicate that feat for anyone else.) I tried taking out chocolate and thankfully that wasn’t it – can you imagine depriving a new mother of chocolate?? – but after several friends’ suggestions, I decided to try removing dairy from my diet. This might not be so bad for some people but as a vegetarian (vegaquarian, actually), taking out dairy makes me just eggs shy of a vegan again. And I did not like being vegan. Unfortunately it seems to really help her.
Which brings me back to my milk cravings. Not having a glass of milk to partner with homemade chocolate cake (curse you Gym Buddy Krista!) is one thing but no ice cream? That’s a crime against humanity. In its place I have developed an unhealthy addiction to Red Mango frozen yogurt. Thanks to the suggestion of Heather Eats Almond Butter I’ve started subbing almond milk for regular. Why almond milk? I’ll be honest with you: soy milk tastes like dirt (not to mention the phytoestrogen issues with soy protein isolate.) Hemp milk is pungent dirt. And rice milk is nutritionally void. And while almond milk tastes a little dirty, at 40 calories, 3g fat, 1 carb and 1g protein, it’s livable. I have not, however, found a suitable substitute for cheese.
You’d think this would take care of My Last 10 Pounds problem lickety split (mmm… banana splits!) but it’s having the opposite effect. This idea of not being able to have something has thrown my brain into rebellion. I feel sad that I can’t have ice cream and so I OD on Fro Yo. I’m cranky that I’m having a cheeseless quesadilla so I eat a handful of chocolate chips. You see how this is going. It’s one thing to choose to not eat something – I choose not to eat meat and for the most part I don’t miss it – but it’s an entirely different story when foods are verboten. Just call me Eve – the allure of the forbidden fruit is strong!
I’m lucky though. My involuntary food restriction will only last until Jelly Bean weans in about 9 months, possibly sooner. (Any Minnesotans want to come to the cheese party I will be hosting then? What, weaning parties aren’t traditional where you are?? We’ll have tres leches cake!) I know I’m not alone in this, reportedly 60% of adults can’t digest milk. Not to mention all the other people with food allergies, Celiac’s disease (gluten intolerance) and other food issues -and they are off the prohibited items for life!
So please tell me how you do it! Do you have a special dietary restriction? What do you do to calm the crazy cravings brought on when you know you can’t have something?
Well, I can't do dairy but I never liked milk even as a kid & was forced to drink it so that led to me not missing it! π I do miss cheese but the up side is it is high in fat & I do like other things better!
I miss my bagels more than anything but I found all these healthy breads that I like a lot & have good fiber/protein & since I eat them plain.. well, I just enjoy them.
I guess for me, things I really want but can't have like 24 hour a day sweets & bread & such… I have learned to make adjustments & find replacements I can live with & be fine with & I treat myself now & then to the cookies & such.
I know this does not help since you can't treat yourself to the dairy products but maybe you can find something you might like almost as well. I always think of the consequences of if I ate to much of these other things & how much harder I would have to work out, if that is possible & also what it takes to work it off.
Maybe think about the poor baby & what she will go thru & it might make it easier for you…
I know, I am a dork! π
Oh man, sounds like my #2 kiddo. Did you try Prevacid for the reflux medicine? It tastes 100x better than the other nasty stuff that my baby just barfed back up. And have you tried taking lactaid? After about 1 month of non-dairy I was going crazy and discovered that if I took lactaid and drank "lactaid milk" (brand name only) then it didn't affect baby. Unfortunately cheese, yogurt and ice cream were off limits. Not a fun time. Best of luck to you girl!
I love your reference to blast-ended skrewts. It pretty much made my day.
I don't know what to offer on the restrictions- I generally do poorly with restrictions, and I end up having a ridiculous binge. That being said, it's never been involuntary, so perhaps the response would be different when looking at a sweet little jelly bean, and realizing that I hate cleaning up vomit?
Chocolate. And then some more chocolate.
Actually, I can't eat soy, dairy or gluten right now. It killed me for a the first few weeks, but I've gotten over it mostly. But yeah, chocolate (dark, dairy and soy free, of course) soothes the soul like nothing else.
I also think about how bad I will feel if I do eat something I can't have. Not that that helps you. But the little bean…
Found your blog through another blog…my child is gluten, nut, was dairy but not limited dairy. We did goat crumbled cheese on pizzas,etc. Nut butters*(if you can have nuts) but how about Tofu? We made Tofu mousse and it was GOOD!! Go google some tofu recipes for ice cream, cheesy things…Good luck. I nursed both kids for 13 mos and stayed away from broccoli!!
Ah, the whole forbidden fruit thing. Or forbidden dairy…whatever. I'm also a sucker for anything off limits. I guess it's just in our nature. That's why I never ban sweets. I'd be trying to break into my work's vending machine with a clothes hanger as soon as a craving hit. I give you credit, though. I could easily do without milk, but never cheese. Nine months? Remind the Jelly Bean of this devotion when she's old enough to give you attitude!
After I had Luke I couldn't have chocolate! It was horrid. And you'd think I would've lost the weight quicker…nope. gained. I have no advice.
(also I nodded vigorously at your bib trials. I would feel the same way, LOL)
Think of how much extra sleep you'll get by skipping the dairy! Yeah, those 4 minutes and 20 seconds will be BLISS!
Speaking of bliss, there's an ice cream substitute called Coconut Bliss (but it may not be available where you are). It's made from coconut milk and agave syrup, and tastes A LOT like regular ol' ice cream. If you can get your hands on it, it's definitely worth it.
Also, there's a cheez product called "We Can't Call it Cheese" that was developed by dairy farmers who discovered they're lactose intolerant (how much does THAT suck?) that I've heard good things about.
Good luck!
(And almond milk is WAY better than soy milk!)
Right now I'm unable to eat yeast, and sugars of all forms (including white flour and FRUIT, of all things) are also supposed to be forbidden. My digestive system goes into fits if I eat those things, especially the yeast. It's taken a lot of adjusting, but basically I have to find replacement items, like tortillas instead of bread, just like your almond milk instead of cow juice. π I can get away with very small portions of sugar, so if you can take just a bite or cheese or a sip of milk to quench the craving, maybe that will help? Best wishes to you and the blast-ended Jelly Bean! π
This is so interesting.
In January 09' I basically didn't know what was wrong with me. I had just gotten out of hospital, twice, and indured a colonoscopy at 25. boo.
I had to take stuff out of my diet. Not only that but couple that with trying to lose weight and breaking up with a crappy boyfriend–I started bingeing.
It's hard to cut out things, but I had to cut out SUGAR, dairy, gluten and toyed with fruit at one point. I can't tell you how many times I had the 'I'll start over tomorrow' and it cost me…30lbs. I gained that much back in six months. It was hurting my stomach SO bad, I was even sicker than I was before because I DIDN'T WANT TO BE TOLD NO.
In the past couple of months, I have come to terms with the fact that I my stomach is the way that it is. Ironically it's made my faith stronger in God, in that I know that I have to be teaching people for a reason that you can. It's made me think outside of the box, develop new recipes and just keep going. I don't want to keep posioning myself with milk, gluten, sugar. It's just not worth it.
What's helped?
-Make a list of things you can eat
-Coconut milk (lite) is so yummy and a great add to coffees/teas.
-Have you tried 'Coconut Bliss' ice cream. It's better than ice cream honesty.
Let go of what you can't have and just embrace what you can. Dig deep in your faith and everything you think that you're being deprived..look at the little miracle that you've made π
thegreatfitnessexperiment.blogspot.com; You saved my day again.
If you can't find Coconut Bliss, So Delicious makes a coconut milk ice cream too. They're both super good.
If you haven't tried Daiya cheese, you must. It's amazing. It melts and it tastes like cheese. My 15yo is vegan and loves Daiya. Even better, it's soy-free. I have to order it online, but it's totally worth it.
Random thoughts – when I was 1st weaned I couldn't tolerate cow's milk, unless it was boiled; have you tried oat milk?; why is frozen yoghurt OK?
P.S. Swedish glace – mmmmm π
INTERESTING!!
I do not do well at all with yeast/gluten (and laugh that I was on this "train" way before it was hip. for about 15 years).
I can totally eat it but I get a rash such that strangers have stopped me and asked if I have poison ivy (its bad. and embarrassing. and yet I still eat the gluten).
THANKFULLY I do not have celiacs so I can eat pasta etc—but the recoiling of people in proverbial horror causes the cravings to massively lessen.
tho yes.
I eat the gluten still and don long sleeves and pants.
Im a role model for nothing,
Miz.
ditto on the coconut ice cream. if you have an ice cream maker, you can MAKE YOUR OWN (!!!!) with full fat canned coconut milk and natural sweeteners like dates and maple syrup with some cinnamon. It has a nice, sort of middle eastern-y taste. Don't worry girl, you ain't gotta give it up! OH, they also have chocolate covered coconut milk ice cream bars that are AWESOME. Seriously, you cannot tell the difference between these and regulars.
very interesting. it's sooo fascinating how connected mothers are with their babies! bummer that you have to give up some stuff though.
No cheese! Poor you! I have to be careful with dairy – I can't drink a glass of milk and I have to be careful with ice cream but I usually don't have any problems with cheese or yogurt, and a little bit of cream in my coffee doesn't bother me. I don't miss drinking milk and I can live without ice cream. I like Almond Milk in cereal. But I would miss the yogurt & cheese!
My brother is more sensitive to milk, but he can still eat yogurt. He can't eat regular cheese, but he can eat goat cheese.
Now if you wanted that glass of milk with a big pickle, the look on your husband's face would have been "priceless." π
Oh my! I feel for you! From about mid-November until about mid-January, I was suffering with gallbladder disease and pancreatitis and was put on a no fat diet.
No fat. At all. Over Thanksgiving and Christmas.
While everyone was enjoying turkey and ham and christmas cookies by the plateful, I was grumbling and eating a lettuce sandwich.
And that is how I dealt with it. Lots of grumbling. And it really helped me to know that there would be an end. I really admire those who deal gracefully with their more serious food restrictions. You are better women than I!
Hi since its not letting me email you. Can i ask how you get such a nice layout for your blog?
I am gluten intolerant and somewhat so with soy, both causing GI distress. Saturated fat seems to cause the same (full fat cheese and ice cream make me double over in pain, but fat free/low fat dairy seems to be fine), as does any deep fried foods.
But I can be like a bratty child and eat these things anyway, the resulting aches sometimes leaving me curled in a ball or unable to sleep. There is a disconnect in my brain, usually associated with negative emotions, that Iβm working on fixing.
Just keep telling yourself it's only a short time….. and it's worth it to not have to deal with all that vomit! π
(And I would LOVE to come to your cheese party – I love cheese.)
Oh I LOVE YOU GUYS!! I went to bed all bummed out and woke up to the news that COCONUT BLISS exists. I am now on a mission to find it:) That and the Daylia cheese/so good we can't call it cheese stuff.
Also – you guys crack me up:) Thanks for the advice and the giggles!
I like Almond milk…but I hear ya. I can't have oranges anymore. They give me migraines.
I've been watching my Dad eating them and daydreaming about orangey goodness…
Geez, woman, all this whining! You're milking it here. (Yeah, I know. Most of your commenters are above such cheap puns.)
I'm just glad you figured out what was making her upset!
I'm also voluntarily vegetarian and I also don't miss meat (I haven't had any beef, chicken, pork, lamb, etc. since January 2004), but I do occasionally eat seafood and I do eat dairy. I have experienced stomach aches as a result of ingesting too much milk and dairy, and I have made attempts to lessen the amount I eat because I CAN digest it but only up to a certain point. But if someone told me I wasn't allowed to have ANY dairy, I know I would be craving nothing but cheese and milk and I would also used other foods to substitute for my beloved missing cheese.
Since you're not eating meat (by choice) and also not eating any dairy now, what is your main fat/protein source? Maybe your body is feeling a deficiency in some area now that you've omitted cheese, et al. and you're compensating by eating other, bad-for-you-but-delicious things?
I do not do well with dairy, but I can not live without ice cream. This brand should be available at Whole Foods.
http://www.turtlemountain.com/products/purely_decadent_Coconut_Milk.html
Have you looked into raw milk? There are lots of reasons to believe that drinking raw (unpasteurized) milk is best for you, including for those with allergies. Read up on it. I'm curious to know what you think!
I've so been here. In fact, at one point with my current darling baby boy, I spent a whole week eating the same nine foods. His issue was abnormal poo. I had done no dairy for a few weeks and nothing had changed. Then I cut out soy. No change. I decided to go on a total elimination diet. Nothing changed when I did that either. As abnormal poo was his only issue (no excessive spitting, no excessive gas, and he growed/is growing like a champ), I just decided to go back to a normal diet and accept his 'abnormal' poo as the new 'normal.'
Anyway, I'm like you, the first thing I did when I cut out the dairy was find every possible substitute I could. Like others have mentioned, coconut ice cream is delish! And, like you, my favorite milk substitute is almond. Have you seen this website: http://thenondairyqueen.blogspot.com/ Lots of recipes that don't have dairy. There is an oatmeal peanut butter cookie one that is particularly addicting. Good luck on your dairy free endeavors!
I'm a lifelong vegetarian who became lactose-intolerant a few years ago, and thus became vegan (I didn't like eggs). I wasn't a huge fan of a lot of dairy, so mostly it wasn't a big deal, but I did like ice cream.
However, after I got sick from eating ice cream, it wasn't that hard to give it up and switch to sorbet/coconut milk ice cream, etc. Even when it's something you liked before, once it makes you physically sick in some way (through an intolerance, allergy, or even triggering migraines, like certain foods do for my friend), that kind of takes away the craving. Or at least, that's how it was for me. I don't miss it.
I would just advise you to be careful, with your history of eating disorders… I could see this being a trigger, and one that sneaks up on you. You even titled your post involuntary food restrictions. I hope feeling restricted doesn't start that cycle for you.
I don't really eat much dairy so I have unsweetened Almond Breeze (chocolate or vanilla) in cereal/oatmeal/smoothies etc. Also, try heating up the unsweetened chocolate Almond Breeze, adding a little bit of melted dark chocolate and some agave to it… DELICIOUS hot chocolate π
For ice cream, I love the frozen bananas trick. Whir it in the food processor with some cacao powder for chocolate ice cream.
Hang in there, Charlotte!
Before I respond for real I need to clean my laptop – spewed protein shake all over when I read the "blast-ended skrewts" reference!
Miss Charlotte,
There is no substitute for cheese– believe me I've tried! I'm desperately allergic to both dairy and gluten and I do go through phases like what you describe– can't have the cake everyone else is eating so I go home and eat an entire pan of gluten-free brownies. What can help is to try new foods that don't have dairy– substitutes for things you are used to don't really taste as good, but if you eat something you have no expectation about, you don't feel like you are missing out. This blog also has a lot of good allergy friendly, many of them vegetarian, recipes: http://www.nourishingmeals.com/ the writer is a mother of three and a chef with a nutritionist husband– everything I've made of hers has been yummy. Good luck!
OK – laptop clean.
First – love Red Mango. We have nothing like that near us so in NYC I wanted to go to a PinkBerry. When we mentioned this to a friend who lives in NYC she suggested Red Mango instead – one night we did a taste-off, having both in a row (they were right across the street from each other – so odd) and we all liked Red Mango better.
Second – my youngest is lactose intolerant (really has irritable bowel but milk stuff is what really kills her) but cheese does not seem to bother her the way that milk/cream does. I have no real suggestions – I expect Soy Cheese would be nasty.
I do totally get the concept of wanting whatever you cannot have. It is why I tend to fail on very restrictive diets – if I tell myself I cannot have sweets (or bread, or …), I will fixate on it and first eats tons of other stuff and finally, binge on whatever it is I was restricting. Ugh.
My mother was convinced I was lactose intolerant as a child. I could tolerate some cheese, some ice cream, but glasses of milk were too much for me. Honestly, what I would miss most is the cheese. I'm fully down with almond milk if I need cereal, I can do non-dairy frozen treats no prob, but not being able to eat pizza, have some jalapeno pepper jack on a sammich… argh!
The bad thing – there are very few good cheese substitutes. But maybe I haven't looked hard enough. Good luck and at least you have an end to it – most likely your bean will have to live with it for longer than you will.
I was exactly like your little Jelly Bean when I was a baby. I was severely colicky, and they just could not figure out why. Finally, a few months into my "8 hour screamfest, 10 minute nap, rinse and repeat" life, they figured out I was lactose intolerant, and that took care of that!
Soy milk was my go-to for a lot of my life, but but I recently developed weird menstruation cycles because of the estrogen overdose from it. Lately, I've just been using skim sparingly (no tall glasses on milk, but it's fine as an addition to cereal or in recipes), and it hasn't wrecked havoc on my system.
And my "The more you know…" moment of today… did you know that people of asian, native american or native alaskan heritage have nearly a 100% rate of lactose intolerance? I'm part native american, which is probably where I inherited that from.
I see a few people beat me to telling you about the Coconut Bliss:
http://www.coconutbliss.com/html/flavors.html
My favorite flavor is the plain Naked Coconut. No, maybe it's the Dark Chocolate. No, wait a second, maybe it's the Mint Galactica. Aww, heck, you'll just have to try them all. Warning: This stuff can only be bought in pints, and it's even more expensive than Haagen Dasz!
Isn't a cheeseless quesadilla just a tortilla? I can't eat corn. Oh, how I miss Doritos!!!
I have too many restrictions to list but I am not breastfeeding (as far as I know) so I *could* eat these things. The foods are more like trigger-types and the primary trig is bread. So I don't have any in the house and when I go to my sister's house, and see that package of bread fresh from the bakery, I notice the word RYE on the package and steer clear. Yuck!
I'm a Minnesotan. Did I hear something about a CHEESE PARTY? With CAKE?
(Vanilla almond milk: better than regular.)
Ahhh Charlotte, I'm so sorry as I know you love your Greek yogurt. You know I don't do the dairy thing either, except for high fat, like butter and cream. As long as they're is little to no dairy protein, I seem to do okay. However, even the full fat yogurt and cottage cheeses still contain too much whey and casein. π
I'm a huge fan of the So Delicious coconut milk ice-cream…and the price alone will keep you from ODing. π
Have not found a suitable cheese alternative. None of them melt like the real thing.
Oy, you poor thing. Yes, the So Coconut is great. I am fortunate in that I have no dietary restrictions other than the ones I place on myself. I like almond breeze too. Just not as much as milk. People make all sorts of milks by soaking nuts (cashews etc) in water, then blending. But no idea about the calories. I'm sure you'll find some good solutions and perhaps your mind will stop torturing you about what you can't have.
Isn't frozen yogurt still dairy? (yogurt!) Sorbet is non-dairy. It's definitely a good thing that your jelly bean is showing such early signs of milk-intolerance. It's much better than never really realizing it like the 60 % of american adults (the figure for the entire world is much larger). Now, she will always know that it is a problem and will prevent larger issues from occurring. As for you, maybe this isn't so bad! Just concentrate on how good you feel in other aspects of your health. Maybe you're not bloated anymore from dairy. Or just feel good that you're helping your baby girl and that you don't have to pump her with medicine or clean up messy stuff! π All good things. Keep positive and try not to think if it as deprivation. Think of it as a chance to help your baby and as a chance to try new foods! (always fun)
I have an intolerance to gluten and dairy. If I eat either, I literally blow up like a balloon and you'd swear I was pregnant! Talk about incentive to stay away! It's hard because that means no bread, bagels, most cereals, regular cookies and cakes, etc. I make my own gf versions, but it can be a hassle. I really don't miss milk tho, or cheese. I deal with it by staying positive as I told you before. It works for the most part π
Best of luck!!
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