“I like weights. You know where you stand with them. Well, sometimes you’re lying under them, trying not to let them crush you, but you see, you know they’d crush you if they could. There’s honesty.” – One of my all-time favorite quotes about fitness (truly, nothing is more honest than weight lifting!) from my Shape.com slideshow The Smartest Things Ever Said About Fitness.
One of the best things about my job, even better than getting to interview celebs like Allison Sweeney and Tony Horton, is getting to talk to all kinds of people and see how fitness has changed their lives. Sure weight loss comes up a lot – usually in the context of “What’s the fastest way to lose weight?” I like Oprah’s reply: “There is no easy solution. If there was I would have bought it and it would be one of my favorite things.” – but the most common benefits people see from exercise have to do more with how they feel than how they look. Recently I asked people on my Facebook what their fave fitness perk is. Confidence, a brighter mood, fewer meds and even a better sex life were just a few of the amazing stories shared.
This is Lindsey and her new fiancee. Is this not the cutest engagement pic ever?!? Plus, she used to be a professional belly dancer and has offered to fulfill a lifelong dream of mine and do a mini-experiment teaching the Gym Buddies and I a routine! Look for that post this month!
Take, for example, my friend Lindsey who wrote, “When I was a sophomore in college, I was diagnosed with stomach problems. Then I joined the YMCA, and thanks to my increased activity, weight loss, and stress reduction, I don’t need to take the medication anymore! Not to mention that it gave me a great group of girlfriends!” And I can vouch for how great those girlfriends are since one of them’s me;)
To check out the rest of the stories, see my post for Shape How Has Being Active Changed Your Life?
But one of the most interesting parts of the Facebook discussion were the few brave friends who dared to also point out an interesting negative consequence of getting fit.
Michelle G. wrote, “The thinner I got, ironically the more self-conscious I became because I fit into the ‘normal’ people world. When I was fat I could hide away. I also feel internal pressure to [always] be training for something. But I’m learning how to be my own person. And just because I’m not doing a race or training for a tri doesn’t mean I’m not active! Plus, I love that my pulse is super low and I can see muscles in my arms!”
Quish T., who recently lost a ton of weight, agreed, adding, “I will also tell you something bad. I am acutely, ACUTELY aware of everything I put in my mouth. I am obsessive about it. In my mind I calculate how many calories this was, how long I will have to work out to burn off that. I used to think as a bigger person I was “ok” with it. But now as someone who can shop at a “normal” store I find I am actually more critical of myself. I feel like people who knew me when I was bigger are watching me. To see what I eat, if I gain weight, if I work out. It’s crazy…almost worse.”
Honestly it had never occurred to me how much pressure people who lose a lot of weight must feel and how that might affect them when it comes to life-long habits and how they view exercise. I mean we all know that I’ve been crazy and obsessive about my food and exercise (doing light years better now -holla!) but I never thought about how losing weight could make a formerly overweight person, well, disordered. Although now that I type that I want to #facepalm. Heck, people from The Biggest Loser have been talking for years about how it gave them an eating disorder but they’re doing things that are obviously insane, right? Does it really have the same effect for normal people doing the whole “making healthy changes” thing?
Indeed, it can. Tara Parker-Pope wrote an absolutely illuminating article on this very subject for the New York Times called “The Fat Trap.” It’s lengthy but worth the read as she details her own roller coaster weight struggle, the research that explains why a calorie is not “just a calorie”, and the realities of what people do to maintain their weight loss and the toll it takes on them. One woman even weighed her poop so she could get the most accurate measurement of her RMR (resting metabolic rate) so that she wouldn’t go over her calorie allotment.
So now I’m dying to hear your stories! How has being active changed your life for the better? And have you seen any negatives to it? Those of you who have lost a lot of weight, can you relate to Michelle, Quish and Tara’s (look at me all on a first-name basis with her!) struggles??
Being active has significantly improved my immune system and my mood. And I love that I can now list running as a ‘cool’ hobby.
On the other hand, losing weight had quite a different effect. At first, I felt fantastic and proud, but soon I became very self-conscious. When I was overweight, I didn’t care about how I looked at all, but now that I’m so close to looking smoking hot, but not quite there yet, I’m much more critical about my looks. A few years ago, I would have been thrilled to have my current body and shape, but today I keep thinking about those dang ‘last 10 pounds’ that I want to lose so badly to really have the body I’ve always dreamed of. It’s so frustrating sometimes, knowing that I’m so close to my goal, but somehow I just can’t make it happen. Back in the day when I was much heavier I used to think, “why bother? I’ll never be skinny/pretty/hot anyway”.
” today I keep thinking about those dang ‘last 10 pounds’ that I want to lose so badly to really have the body I’ve always dreamed of. It’s so frustrating sometimes, knowing that I’m so close to my goal, but somehow I just can’t make it happen.” I can so so sympathize with this!
I was never self-conscious until I started working at a gym.
I’d worked out there for five years on and off (the way people with memberships their employers pay for do when the gym is next door), and always felt good when my fitness level was up, though I never saw a big change in weight or body composition (probably because I was eating crap in direct proportion to how much I exercised).
But when I needed a job and started working there, it’s like EVERYBODY on staff has body issues. People are too fat or too skinny. People with 4% body fat and a 3xbody weight deadlift complain they don’t have enough body fat before they hit a 5K warmup on the track. People with 9% body fat are pinching their non-existent pooches and talking about getting in a third session that day.
Holy hell.
I am now a little obsessive about my weight (such that I’m on a scale twice a day, beginning and end). I’m conscious of what goes in my mouth, how I’m feeling and diagnosing what I ate or drank that could be making me feel that way. I’m so conscious of exercise form that I even think about how I’m walking up the stairs or getting out of a chair.
As I progress up the management chain at the gym, my goal is to do stuff more automatically, and just enjoy my life outside the gym. But jeez, 2011 was a scary year sometimes.
Holy hell indeed! I often wondered how people who work in the fitness profession deal with that stress to “look the part”. I hope that 2012 is better for you! Sounds like at least you know the problem now:)
I can’t relate to how being more fit can make you feel more self-conscious than being out of shape. I work at the Y, and I like that people are looking at me as a source of inspiration. It keeps me accountable in my workouts (I can always squeeze out another pull-up if someone is watching!) and in what I eat at home.
I’ve said it before but I think you have a special ability (to go along with your ability to find everything – come to my house please!!) to be very confident in who you are and not worry about what others are thinking or doing. I’ve always admired that about you!
The biggest negative I see is it takes a lot of time!
My concern with Dr. Parker-Pope is that she has a bias because of her need to explain her difficulty with weight loss rather than take personal responsibility for it.
Although I have never weighed my poop, I do get obsessive about calories in, calories out, calories burned for a specific workout, I take my measurements and weight weekly and am constantly setting new goals for myself. The last 7 months or so I have taken it a little easier on myself since I am pregnant, but I still get caught up in how much I should gain vs. How much I have gained vs. Just keeping it healthy for baby and not worrying about numbers. With my first pregnancy I gained 60lbs, and lost it all and then some, making this pregnancy very different because I know now how hard it is to lose it. At times, if I don’t keep a close watch on myself, I do display characteristics of disordered eating and I could easily take the downward spiral to full-blown eating disorder.
On another note, I love that you have listed “gym buddies” as one of the best perks to working out. I had great friends at the gym I used to work out at, but recently moved to another state. How do you suggest meeting new “gym buddies” and not coming off totally creepy in the locker room???
Ah girl, I feel you about the obsessiveness during pregnancy! As much as I say it’s not going to bother me it does, every time. Just remember you making a real human in there which is a workout in its own right! As for your q about meeting new gym buddies, def. don’t do it in the locker room, hahah! I’ve had the best luck in group fit classes or on the stretching mats after a workout.
So far, I haven’t seen a negative side to exercising. Then again, I’m not obsessive about it (other than that bought with scale obsession) and I’ve always been very confident and comfortable in my body. Now that I’m focusing on my health and quality of life over a number on the scale, I’m even further removed from caring what size someone else is in comparison.
I really do wonder why I’ve always had so much confidence in myself…makes me sound arrogant sometimes, I think.
I don’t think it makes you sound arrogant at all! I think you are brilliant and I want Jelly Bean to be able to say this someday too: ” Now that I’m focusing on my health and quality of life over a number on the scale, I’m even further removed from caring what size someone else is in comparison.”
I can really relate to this…I find the “now that I’m thin what do I do?” rearing it’s ugly head. It’s hard to just eat healthy and exercise and not obsess about calories. It’s hard to try and retrain yourself to not overeat for years and work to be healthy and critique yourself and then…then just expect to stop. Defaults in my head towards food are indeed changing to the positive, but things like using too much sweeteners or obsessing about enough exercise can sneak up on you. I wish I were the kind of person who could only have “just one” of an unhealthy treat – it would make my transition to normality a bit easier.
It comes and goes really…
Taking a week off from exercise over the holidays and relaxing a bit and just eating what I liked resulted in me only gaining a pound… Yup – it turns out the world doesn’t end when I let myself be contented and less restricted. I’m trying to learn from that experience as a reminder that I don’t need to obsess to be healthy. I keep reminding myself I’m in this for my *health* not my booty!
This: “Yup – it turns out the world doesn’t end when I let myself be contented and less restricted.” made me grin:)) Yes for health! (But I tot sympathize about not being able to eat just 1 either!)
I can’t agree with the premise of the fat article. First of all, all the exercise mentioned are low-intensity cardio. Where are the free weights!?
Second, it seems just as plausible that these people have problem maintaining their weight not because they were previously fat because of how they lost it. What body WOULDN’T freak out on a 500 cal/day diet? Your weight isn’t just about calories in/out but about things like the hormonal balance in your body and what’s going on in your head. How many of these people packed the pounds back on because they never addressed the needs food were filling for them?
If you eat because you’re bored you will need to find a new distraction (hint: hit the gym!).
If you eat to comfort yourself you need to find other comforts or support systems in your life.
If you eat to punish yourself you need to find a way to give yourself compassion.
You get the drift. People eat for BILLIONS of reasons, very few actually has to do with what the body needs and everything to do with what your mind wants.
I enrolled in the Precision Nutrition Lean Eating program in July last year. It’s a 12 month program (that’s right, 12 frigging months to lose weight, because going slowly works) and one of the things it has addressed beyond providing me with an exercise program and teaching me healthy habits in terms of eating and treating my body right little by little is to figure out my emotional connection with food and reconnect with what my body ACTUALLY needs. It used to be so simple for me to overeat or munch on crappy snacks and candy. It’s so much harder for me because I can actually FEEL when I’m getting full now, and sub-par candy taste exactly like that, sub-par.
I have never felt healthier or stronger. I have never been as positive about my mental health as I am now. I have the deepest compassion and sympathy for people trying to lose weight (I’ve tried myself so many times before) because it’s hard and the world seem designed to indulge over-eating, but there are ways to do it in a healthy, happy way that does not mean you have to obsess with every gram put into your body for the rest of your life.
Congratulations on your fabulous success with the PNLE program! I’ve never heard of that one before but it sounds very sensible!
The year that I lost weight also became the year that developed some disordered eating habits. Like others, I obsessed about calories and fat. Timing of macronutrients. Time spent exercising. I was anxious and uncomfortable a lot. But I also loved the way my body looked.
When I made the conscious decision to stop being obsessive about food, the weight slowly came back. Now I’m trying to find a way to balance the two: to exercise and eat healthy and be comfortable in my skin no matter the shape.
I’m actually pretty good until I go to try and buy clothes.
” Now I’m trying to find a way to balance the two: to exercise and eat healthy and be comfortable in my skin no matter the shape.” You and me both:)
I’ve never been overweight, but I can relate, in a sense, because I think there is a certain pressure within the fitness community to (as one of your comments on FB said) always be training for something. ALWAYS be working on something. I wound up quitting my running club, because I always felt pressured to run “just one more” when we’d already ran two 3 mile or 5 mile circuits.
and The Biggest Loser… oh The Biggest Loser (back on TV last night)… and it was NO coincidence that I found myself out walking almost two miles in incredibly cold weather… that show ALWAYS makes me want to go exercise… something about it… I need to erase the series from being recorded on my DVR.
And that is exactly why I don’t watch TBL!
And by two miles I meant two hours – my brain was probably frozen 😉
When I weighed more than I do now I cared about my appearance but not obsessively. I’ve lost the last 15 lbs in the last couple of years but I spent most of 2010 and all of 2011 trying to lose and keep off 5 more lbs. And at times I had really disordered thoughts and actions toward food like obsessively counting every kcal and weighing myself every day and letting that number dictate my mood for the rest of the day. And my friends from high school watch me eat when we’re together b/c they are convinced I’ve “gone overboard” with healthy eating and fitness. But since I discovered Rachel Cosgrove thanks to this blog, Charlotte (thank you!), I am devoted to strength training and I love my bi-weekly sessions with my trainer and I am in a much better place. I wish I didn’t care so much about the number of the scale but I still do and is something I’ll continue to work on. But, and my point here, is that I am in better shape than I ever have been, I sleep better, I’m more confident and feel like I’m right where I’m supposed to be.
Sooo glad you are getting strong and enjoying Rachel Cosgrove’s workouts!! They’re awesome. And congrats on all the progress you’ve made:)
I seem some positives mostly from weights and yoga, but only negative from endurance type activites as I deal with getting addicted to it. A lot of it depends on how I’m doing at the time with my eating disorder and going after strength without worry about fat or being thin.
“(…) the research that explains why a calorie is not ‘just a calorie'”.
Er, no, a calorie is still a calorie. That research only argued that some people have a greater predisposition to build FFM instead of fat reserves 🙂
I think the point was less of a literal one (okay, yes, a Kcal is a Kcal mathematically speaking) but more of an overarching one to explain why your body may use that same number of calories in a much different manner than mine. Generally people who make the “a calorie is just a calorie” argument are using it to say that what works for one person must work the same way for someone else because “it’s just math.” I think the research has pretty conclusively shown now that there are a lot of factors (and not just “emotional” ones) that go into metabolism.
I can’t really say anything negative about it besides I have less free time. 🙂 I feel better, look better, and figure that I can do just about anything if I went from morbidly obese to half marathoner/triathlete/etc
Sometimes I have “image in the mirror” issues, but they’re nothing near what they were when I was huge.
Well, I’ve never even considered weighing my poop, but I think anyone that has lost a large amount of weight experiences both negative and positive outcomes. For me, the positives definitely outweigh the negatives. I have more energy, I’m more outgoing and social, I can take long walks and go hiking with friends, and I no longer have to shop at Lane Bryant. However, like Quish T, I am much more aware of everything that goes into my mouth. Before losing weight, I had such a “whatever” attitude about food and was really laid back. If a friend called me to go to dinner at the last minute? Sure. A roommate wanted to bake late night cookies? Yeah, why not, but now I’m like “well, where do you want to go to eat?”, and thinking about what I’ll order, and if it will be too heavy based on what else I ate that day, and late night cookies? “Um, no thanks. Why don’t we snack on dark chocolate instead?”
It’s funny, not in a laughing way, how quickly we can raise (in this case lower) the bar in the case of weight when we’re losing. I’m lighter than I’ve been since I was 17, but now I flab is even more obvious because there’s less of it, and it’s less acceptable for the same reason.
As a bigger person – tall, broad, heavy-boned – I can put a lot on before anyone notices. (Losing goes the same.) It doesn’t take me long to be out of normal sizes but I’ve never fit into plus sizes (who cuts these things!?) and then when I lose weight and STILL can’t find normal clothes because I’m tall and broad and NOT made in China, I get the message that I’m “big” so why worry about what I eat or do?
Okay this: ” I’m tall and broad and NOT made in China,” totally made me laugh. I love you! And I know a lot of us can relate to this: “now I flab is even more obvious because there’s less of it, and it’s less acceptable for the same reason.”
I am half-way to my weight-loss goal of losing 100 lbs. In fact, I spent the past year maintaining the first 50 lb loss before continuing on with my goal. There were many reasons for this, some physiological and some psychological, some conscious and some not. But looking back, perhaps the most significant reason that I had to rest half way through is that I needed to readjust my psyche. I built my entire identity around being a fat girl; it had become a kind of comfort to me. This was especially true because of my experiences with sexual abuse: I felt that my weight would somehow protect me from unwanted attention from men. Right around that 50 lb mark I started getting looks again, and I had to take the time to learn to feel safe in my transforming body.
Thank you for this blog post! People (including me) underestimate the emotional turmoil that accompanies hefty weight-loss. The expectation is that we will automatically be so much happier if we lose the weight, that being thin will solve most/all of our problems. The interesting thing is that the real happiness to be gained by losing is the growth that comes from mindfully navigating this emotional turmoil– pushing and reflecting and pushing again, showing yourself that you believe you are worth caring for.
I wish every woman currently on a weight loss journey could read this comment! This: “People (including me) underestimate the emotional turmoil that accompanies hefty weight-loss. The expectation is that we will automatically be so much happier if we lose the weight, that being thin will solve most/all of our problems. The interesting thing is that the real happiness to be gained by losing is the growth that comes from mindfully navigating this emotional turmoil– pushing and reflecting and pushing again, showing yourself that you believe you are worth caring for.” is very profound. Thank you for saying it so much better than I could!
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Like Diana, my negative issues with losing weight are largely psychological. I dropped about 40 lbs over the course of college. By Senior year, I was “healthy” according to the numbers for the first time in my life. It took working out for 2 hours a day, a minimum of 5 days a week. In the winter, this was paired with the occasional full-weekend Tournament, which basically meant working out in short bursts all day for two days. With all of that, I just — barely — hit the “ideal weight” I’d been told about in Nutrition in HS. In college this was fine; I had the time to do it, and I had a great time. Then I graduated and moved to a big city. I still wasn’t use to the stares and comments, because growing up I was always the chubby one and basically invisible, and my college was a particularly sheltered bubble when it comes to things like that. After I got assaulted, I figured it’d just be safer to gain the weight back. I put on 20 lbs rather quickly and it stopped.
Four years later, I’m trying to get back into the headspace necessary to get healthier again.
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