Memorial Day weekend will find my family and I memorializing our time in Minnesota as we close this chapter of our lives and start the Colorado one. It’s exciting. It’s terrifying. The day I found out (Friday) I spent the entire afternoon laying in my bed weeping and watching a Call the Midwife marathon. (If you ever feel like your life is bad try watching a destitute British prostitute from the 1950’s have a baby with no meds, get sent to a convent and then have her baby taken away for adoption. Oh, and did I mention the girl is 15? There are problems and then there are Problems. But don’t let that scare you off the show – it’s as beautiful as it is gritty! Lots of babies! Coming out of very anatomically correct places! See – you totally want to watch this now!) Moving makes me sad. Babies make me happy. Both make me cry! There was a lot of crying Friday. My kids thought I’d lost my mind. And I kinda had.
I’m in the mourning phase of moving. Like I explained to my ecstatic-to-have-a-new-job husband, it’s not that I’m not excited or happy, it’s just that first I need to be sad about all the amazing, wonderful, one-of-a-kind people we’re leaving behind. We made friends that are like family to us and, let’s be honest, leaving all my Gym Buddies/Turbo Buddies is going to be wrenching. It’s so bad, I can’t even think about it right now without getting slightly hysterical. These girls have got me through some seriously crazy stuff and I love them all like sisters.
Yet I know I’ll love Colorado when I get there. And I know this because I’ve loved every place I’ve ever lived (Okay, with the exception of west Philadelphia. Ugh.) and that’s been a lot of places. Because I’m a mover. And my husband’s a mover. After reading through all the replies on Facebook to my announcement I’ve decided that people are either movers or stayers. The latter group has stayed in one place for most of their lives and can’t imagine why anyone would want to leave such a great thing. The former never stay in any place long and can’t imagine why anyone would want to stay in one spot when there are so many great things to be seen. And there’s nothing wrong with being a Mover or a Stayer. But, and I’m totally over generalizing here, it seems as if you’re either one or the other. Even if you’re a mover who ended up staying somewhere, you still have that attitude of “Wouldn’t it be fun to go…” And if you’re a stayer who got moved around a lot, you still feel that inexorable pull towards home. Maybe that’s the main difference: Stayers have a physical home. Movers have more of a conceptual home. One is tied to geography while the other is tied to a feeling. Both are good. Both are bad. Both have a hard time understanding each other, frankly.
But all of that is neither here nor there. The real issue at hand is that my husband’s first day of work is the day after Memorial Day which means we have THREE WEEKS to get all our crap in a van, do a quick headcount of the kids and head for the hills. It’s fast. It’s stressing me out. This blog is going to suffer. Sorry, I really wish I could keep all my balls in the air but at the moment I’m about to be crushed by one very huge, immediately pressing circus ball: The Move. I can’t think about anything else. All my spare anxiety has been relocated from my thighs to finding a good school district for my kids. (Which is probably a good thing, actually.) I’m going to do my best but I just wanted to warn you in advance. There might be silence. There might be an onslaught of crazy. There might be panic attacks and emotional eating and overly personal confessions. Or it might all go totally smoothly and I’ll look like a dork for worrying so much. I don’t know.
All I do know is that I’ve got to get out of bed, stop crying and get to work.
Saturday morning was a good way to do that. Gym Buddy Allison picked me up bright and early for the Run or Dye race we’d signed up for together months ago. Even though I’ve stressed myself into a nasty cold, I wasn’t going to let her down and miss our last race together. It was a riot. We got colored powder dumped all over us.
We froze our tushies off (30 degrees. IN MAY. It’s like Minnesota is trying to make me move.).
We may have bogarted the start line after we waited in the cold for an hour and 20 minutes and still couldn’t even see the start line. (Seriously, this race was SO poorly organized that I don’t even feel the tiniest bit bad for sneaking around the barriers and dropping into the pack like a paparazzo after Kate Middleton.)
We ran. We took a bunch of pictures (the whole point anyhow right?).
And then we added an extra mile to our run because Allison’s car was over its time limit on the parking meter so we couldn’t wait for the shuttle or else she’d end up with a $100 fine for a race souvenir.
Then we did this:
That was a well-earned pedi!
Lastly, Allison told me she learned the “cups” song from Pitch Perfect (“You’re Gonna Miss Me When I’m Gone” by Anna Kendrick), using the cup and everything! So when it came on the radio, it seemed fittingly bittersweet. And I’m not going to lie: I had tears in my eyes listening to her sing it.
I am going to miss you when you’re gone. So so hard.
So don’t be shy, tell me your Number (of moves): are you a Mover or a Stayer? What’s your favorite place you’ve ever lived? Have you got in on the color run trend yet? What did you think? Lastly, if anyone has any advice for me on where to live in the west Denver metro area, pleeeeease tell me!
One last q: Should we bring the cat with us? We love her to death and I’d never leave her except that it appears we are going to have to live in corporate housing (that doesn’t allow pets) for a few months and I’m worried that taking her on an 18-hour car ride, dropping her at a pet sitter and then relocating her to our new house will be altogether too traumatic for her. (Also, like that I’m worrying about this over my cat but not my kids? My kids are awesomely resilient. My cat is brittle.) UPDATE: A couple of people thought this means I’m considering abandoning our cat or dumping her at a shelter. We would never do that – she is part of the family 100%. I was just concerned that all the moving would be too traumatic for her but it seems from the comments it seems that she’ll probably do fine. If anyone has ideas for what to do with her while we are living in corporate housing for three (ish) months that would be great.
Wow!
Ohwowohwowohwowohwow!!!!!!
Sad, yes, but also exciting!
BTW, my brother-in-law just moved to Boulder, so you’re doing what all the cool kids are doing by moving to Colorado.
Don’t worry about us: Post as much or as little as you want/need to. We’ll be here.
((Hugs))
Thanks Alyssa – your continued friendship over all these years means more to me than you know:)))
Love you! 🙂 🙂 🙂
Now I get it. this is how I know you. Twitter. (I also messaged you on fb) .. I just opened up twitter and you were the first tweet timeline so I thought it would be funny to answer you here too. By the way, I said before … you are going to love Colorado! The flights between Denver and Minnesota are relatively easy, so you will have more guests than you ever knew was possible! I have a number of friends from Minnesota and that is the case for every single one of them! There is so much available to do for you, your family, etc… not just the usual.. skiing or hiking… but REAL things.. Denver Museum of Nature & Science, Denver Art Museum, Denver Museum of Contemporary Art, Colorado Children’s Museum & the Denver Zoo … then there is music… from Red Rocks to the Paramount Theater, The Fillmore to concerts in the Park at the Botanic Gardens, Comfort Dental Theater, The Fox in Boulder, the Boulder Theater, The Buebird to the Pepsi Center, IMAX and Denver Center For the Performing Arts to smaller dinner theaters.. amazing things to do. We are a super sports town… Colorado Avs Hockey, Denver Broncos Football, Denver Nuggets Basketball, Colorado Rockies Major League Baseball, Colorado Rapids Soccer, Denver Barbarians Rugby, Colorado Mammoth Lacrosse … to NASCAR Furniture Row Team headquartered here, and Bandimere Speedway. We have great college level hockey at DU (Pioneers) and the list goes on… amusement and water parks, recreation centers, train rides, ski train, …. Denver is an active place with hiking trails and biking trails right in town, tons of parks and places to be outdoors… Always a great restaurant for a date night out … we really do have so much here…. and you are going to love it! (here is a fb page to follow… . https://www.facebook.com/365DenverKids) Welcome.
You are such a sweetheart Bobbi!! Thank you so so much for this and for all your help!
Are we talking moves to new houses? Or moves to new cities? So far, I’ve moved 9 times = Michigan to Indiana to New York to Portugal to Texas to Florida to Texas to Michigan to Hawai’i to Wyoming. And I’m a military wife, so…about 10 more moves til retirement 🙂 you’re kids will be better for it and your cat will live. She’ll be ticked, but she’ll live. Good luck! You’re always in my prayers 🙂
Thanks Shayna! And we’ve decided we’re taking the cat for sure. I don’t know what I was thinking, lol. Good luck with the future moves! My dad worked with the military when I was growing up so I feel you there!
That is awesome! We almost moved to Colorado a few years ago but moved to Sweden instead. We did spend 3 months there while waiting for our work permits and loved it. I’ve moved 12 times in my life (military brat). I think you might be able to ask/locate a temporary house that will allow the cat. Every time we’ve moved we’ve somehow found a way to take the cat and he’s been more resilient than you’d expect. When we moved to Sweden we went from Chicago to Colorado for 3 months (1 month in a different house each) then Colorado to my in-laws, then my parents, then back to Chicago and then to Sweden, where we’ve lived 3 places in the last year and a half. The cat has somehow handled all of it really well (he wasn’t always happy about it, but he always settled down).
Okay this makes me feel better! If your cat can survive a trans-Atlantic move surely mine will be okay across a few states!
I think I am the queen of moving… I’m 24 and I’ve moved house 25 times in my life. Up until I was 21, all of those moves were within the same state. I then moved cross-country (Australia) on my own and then moved to London a year ago. My husband has lived all over the world and has a problem staying in one place for too long, so I’m sure I will have many other cities under my belt by the time I’m 30!
My cat sadly died two months ago, but he handled the move from Oz to London extremely well. He was a rescue cat and very scared in general, so we worried about him making the trip (2 days in quarantine plus a 24 hour flight!). He took it amazingly well and settled into his new home so fast, it was like nothing was different. The only issue we had was the ludicrous cost – it was $2200 for his flight, which was almost the cost of my husband and mine’s combined!
This makes me feel better now – we’re def taking the cat! Although $2200?!? Eeek! (And I’m so sorry your cat died – they really do become a member of the family!)
I’m definitely a stayer. I live in the same house I grew up in. I have nightmares that we move out and an other family moves in and cuts down our trees and shrubs and remodels the home to look like a generic home. Ugh.
I wouldn’t be able to part from my cat either. Hate that she has to live in a shelter too.
I already miss your gym buddies.
Aw:( I already miss them too!!!
Oh man, but I feel you. The husband and I are both from the midwest. In the early years of our marriage, we lived both abroad and in various parts of the US. Then we settled down a bit and lived in the Carolinas for the last ten years, eight of those in the same community where we put down ROOTS and had our children. Then last May the husband accepted a job that he was thrilled to get in Austin, TX. The kids and I finished up the house stuff and then joined him the last week of June.
I was both excited for the challenge and the change and devasted to leave my group of friends who I’d been pregnant, cried, vacationed, worshipped, and laughed myself silly with. I could see my life there still spread out before me where I would live there maybe forever and grow old with these people. My then five year old son cried continuously and didn’t want to leave his friends.
But, especially as a sahm, I’ve moved for the husband’s job before and will always do what I can to support him in his career.
Our first year here is almost over. We’ve been renting while we figured out where we wanted to be and close on our new house in less than two weeks (crossing fingers that the builders have it ready! We’ve had some adventures in new construction!) and I can say now 100% (okay, 98%) that I’m glad we moved. We’ve made some great friends and are building a new life here. This is… If not home, almost home. And my last home and all my dear friends there will always have a place in my heart. It will always be remembered as some of my sweetest years.
But a year later, we are happy.
So enjoy your last few weeks and give yourself a chance to mourn. And then throw yourself into your new life. Summer is a great time to move, but our summer last year was also lonely. We threw the kids into activities and lived at the pool, but didn’t make “real” friendships until the school year started.
I wish you be best! It’s going to be fun!
Thank you! Your story makes me feel a little better:) I know that I’ll be happy we made the move once we get there and get settled! It’s just all the stuff in between that’s hard. I’m so sorry you had to leave North Carolina but thrilled that you are enjoying your new home in Texas!
Color run = overblown hype. I like to RUN at a race! Also, FlyLady is awesome in general, and has some moving tips you may find helpful. Or maybe not. You’re already pretty Fly at life, so you may not need Fly lady’s guidance like I do! http://www.flylady.net/d/getting-started/flying-lessons/moving/
Okay seriously – What is UP with all the walkers?? I actually went and looked up the race site again when I got home ’cause I was confused. It’s not that I mind walkers it’s just that there were so many of them that I wondered if I’d missed the point of the race or something??
I’m a mover, but I got moved a lot as a kid and I don’t want that for my kids, so I’m a stayer until they graduate high school. The color run thang is what has got me running again. I want to do one with my 12 year old son this summer.
That would be a perfect run to do with kids!! Your son would have a riot!
Colorado is so beautiful!!! You will love it! Moving is crazy though, so stressful and you will miss your lovely friends to bits. But the friendships will withstand and there are new friendships on the horizon. I sound so cheezey dont I!?! I’m excited and anxious for you! Good luck and take care of yourself. x
PS I’ve always been a mover, but my 2nd last move was a bit traumatic so now that I’m back in my home town I am feeling like more of a stayer. Got burnt a little too hard maybe. I’ll sure I’ll move again, however.
I’m so sorry you got burnt on your last move! I’m glad you are back home – at least for a bit:) And you’re not cheesy at all! I love this: ” But the friendships will withstand and there are new friendships on the horizon.” I hope so!!
Best wishes, Charlotte! I’ve heard Colorado is a beautiful place 🙂
Thanks Liza!
Definitely a mover 🙂 – Best place I have ever lived was Paris, not a day I felt sad. Only happy and wonderful memories. That was the beginning of many countries, afterwards like Holland, Germany, UK, Switzerland, Australia and France. I still feel I have not traveled enough 🙂 – I need more in my life. You will love Colorado I’m sure, why wouldn’t you ;p
Aw thanks Sergio! Someday I would like to have visited as many wonderful countries as you have!
Exciting news! We are movers. In our 8 years of marriage we have lived in 5 states and 2 other countries. I think it is fun and keeps you on your toes!
Wow, you’ve got us beat!! And it is fun – I’m excited for a new adventure:)
I’m admittedly horrified that you asked if you should take the cat – what would happen with the cat if you didn’t take it? I’ve volunteered in cat rescue and fostered countless cats that were dumped by their families because it was inconvenient to take them. I don’t want to be judgey mcjudgerson here, but I am a little bit and for that I’m sorry. Congrats on the move. But I really encourage you to find a way to take your cat – she’s probably more adaptable than you’re giving her credit for. My 3 have followed me in about 6 moves now – the most recent one taking us half-way across the country. They’re happy as long as they’re food, sunshine and me.
Sorry – I updated my post. We have a friend here who kindly offered to take her, We would NEVER abandon her or dump her at a shelter. It was never an issue of not wanting to take her because it’s “inconvenient” but more that I was worried she’d be traumatized. (I mean it took her FOUR days to come out of her little hidey hole here when we first got her – I was worried she was going to starve!) Trust me, we will do everything we can to take her with us! We love the stuffings out of her. (Um, not literally) But from the comments here it sounds like she’ll do okay with all the moving? My biggest concern is what to do with her while we are in corporate housing for 3 (ish) months since they don’t allow cats. Maybe instead of judging you can help me figure out a solution? Are there places that would house her for 1-3 months?
Thank you for taking the time to respond. Sorry I was so quick to jump to conclusions – it’s not my best suit, I’m aware and trying to change it. I’m glad to know that you have a strong “plan b” if that’s what it comes to. I’m on my way out the door to work and can’t respond at length but I have a few ideas that may or may not work for you and your family. I’ll post them later for your consideration.
Oh no worries! I just appreciate any help and suggestions you have! 🙂
Sorry it’s taken me so long to get back to you. And sorry in advance for what is probably going to be a rambling response.
I have a few suggestions – which may or may not work out for you, your family and your cat. You know your cat best, if you think that it will struggle to adapt to a new home, you are best equipped to decide that. I personally believe that cats can and do bond closely with their people and that in the vast majority of cases the best thing to do for your cat(s), dogs, ferrets, parrots or whatever is to take them with you. And just so you know, I’m an experienced cat owner who has 3 of my own and has fostered about 75 cats over the course of the last 4 years. Many of these cats were strays, semi-feral and/or aggressive toms that had been living the rough life on the streets. In a lot of cases, other foster homes tried and failed to get these boys ready for life indoors. I was the tomcat whisperer.
If you do decide to bring him along eventually, there are plenty of products available which are designed to play a role in stress reduction. I’ve had the best luck with those that mimic the pheromones of mama cat. This collar has been a miracle worker for my nervous-nelly boy http://www.petsmart.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3446914&f=PAD%2FpsNotAvailInCA%2FNo. You can also try, Bach Flower Rescue Remedy or Holly which I’ve used in the past when integrating semi-feral toms into my home. I purchased mine at a local health food store but their online store is here http://www.bachflowerscanada.com/rescue.htm#rrd10. Just a couple of drops into his drinking water may help ease things for him. I don’t have personal experience with Feliway but I have heard awesome reviews of it. Again, it’s a pheromone but instead of mama cat, it mimics the scents cats use to mark their territory which make them feel safe and secure.
In terms of more practical things, could the friend who offered to take your cat hold onto him for however long it takes to be prepared to have him join you in Colorado? If so and if a trip back to pick him up in Minnesota isn’t a possibility, I’ve never used one, but one that I’ve heard good things about are TLC Pet Transport. Their website is here: http://www.tlcpettransport.com/.
Well there is the option to sneak your indoor cat into your corporate housing, it’s not something I recommend. Above and beyond being ethically questionable, it could have negative ramifications for your husbands new job and in turn your families welfare. However, you could arrange your own short-term rental which does allow animals in Colorado. And if push came to shove, you could always board your cat somewhere while you waited for the perfect home to be found. I’ve had a professional cat sitter board my cats when I was between apartments. I got lucky but it worked out wonderfully for them. My cats got a home experience with someone I knew (she’d been cat sitting for me for a couple of years by than) and trusted. My cats (2 of whom are special needs) were wonderfully taken care of. If you opt to go that route, check references and follow your gut. If it says no, it’s not the right person for you.
Good luck with your move! Try to relax and have fun. Transitions are tough for everyone but change is also exciting.
Hi Charlotte- first time poster, long time reader. I love that you coming to Colorado- we moved here 25 years ago and absolutely love it. But we also had 6 inches of snow last week and 25 degrees! Your cat will be fine; they too are quite resilient. If you are going to the Denver area and need a temporary home for your cat, my two cats like to have a playmate. I would be glad to kitty-sit.
I think, moving from Minnesota, she will be fine. Southern MN got 15 inches of snow last week! Stupid winter.
Haha TRUE. After Minnesota weather I don’t know that anything can throw me anymore.
Thank you Carole! Both for the encouragement and the offer to kitty-sit!!!
We just had to drop our cats off to board at the vet’s office for a week since we are having tile put down in our kitchen & entry way. I was in tears over that. I can’t imagine what I’d do for 3 months. Do you know someone who could take her until you get settled?
I am a stayer. When I was two years old, my parents moved from the city to the small town and exact same house that my dad grew up in. I stayed there until I had to move away when I got my first full time job and I moved to a different province. I moved provinces once more a couple of years later and I’ve been here for 14 years now.
Husband grew up not far from where I did (though we did not meet until college) and we figure that eventually we’ll go back there to retire.
Ah I love it! Hey if you’ve found what you love then it’s a blessing!
Good luck Charlotte! As someone who’s staring in the face a second cross-country move (possibly to Alaska this time!) in less than 2 years I feel your pain. It’s a challenge to keep yourself together. But I know you can do it. I’ll be thinking good thoughts for you! If you need packing/moving links or advice I’m your girl.
I think I’m more a traveler than a mover. I like to see new places but still have my tried and true home. I moved (cities in the same general area) a lot as a kid so I think I still have that same stress about it. (I moved just in time for the last 6 weeks of the school year one time. That sucked.) But I also moved to Scotland for a year in college so I am up for adventure. We’re trying to get it in now because I want to live near our families when we have kids. I grew up on the other side of the country from both of my parent’s families and am still really sad that I have very little connection to any of those people who are all so close to one another.
As for the kitty, take her, definitely. We drove 10 hours a day for 5 days from CA to NC with our 2 and while it was awful (can’t deny that!) and my female cat stuffed herself in a cupboard at the new place and screamed anytime anyone went near her, they settled in in 3 days. I’m sure your friend is very nice but it will be more traumatic for your kitty to be separated from her people than move. When I was a kid we moved our menagerie (2+ dogs, 4+ cats) every time, including into corporate housing with us for several months. They always settled in just fine.
I love the thought of a move…starting over in a new place, making new friends, seeing new parts of the country, getting rid of junk that you would never throw away except in the event of moving, being a part of a new church family(I’m LDS too)…basically reinventing yourself (if you like!). We never moved when I was a kid(went to same public school K-12). I would love to move across the country to experience something different but we don’t want to be so far away from family. So I guess we are stuck here in this small town….which is a great place to raise a family…just wish we had a Target!
(we did a Color Me Rad for my birthday and had the best time. I prepared everyone that it wasn’t a ‘race’ but a fun event. no timing and no pressure. it was great!)
Definitely a mover, and have pretty much loved every place we’ve been. Love the notion of creating a “conceptual” home; that’s exactly what we’ve done! Even our campervan feels like “home” because we have all the stuff we need and each other.
But yeah, the downside of being a mover is the goodbyes. But we’re discovering that often best buds move away themselves anyway, and so we have friends all over the country and, well, the world, and just don’t get to see them often enough. Facebook aint’ the same, but it helps!
As to the cat, could your friend who offered to take the cat permanently just take her while you’re in corporate housing, and then you fly or drive back to see pals in three months and bring the cat back to boulder? Not that two trips would be easy to fit in your budget and schedule, but might not be much worse than the cost of boarding. Or, there’s sneaking the cat in against the rules, which is risky but I would suspect other people might do it…
And, don’t worry too much about blogging while you’re busy, life is more important! I quit for a year and a half and the world didn’t end. People will miss you but won’t abandon you, and google couldn’t care less whether we post or not. 🙂
I really hate moving so I’d probably say I’d prefer to be a stayer but I’ve moved a lot in the last 6 years so I guess my actions make me more of a mover. Hoping to stay in one place for awhile though.
Firstly, hang in there Charlotte! Moving is The. Pits. But you will do fine because you have to do it. Feel free to overshare or emotionally eat if you have to. It’s gonna be OK in the end. And Denver is BEAUTIFUL. My hubby and I honeymooned there and loved it. (Except a half a tree fell on our car in the Denver Zoo parking lot. No lie.) Also, the traffic will seem like cake compared to MSP/StP!
Secondly, I am a stayer. We bought the house my husband grew up in from 14 yrs. old onward. It is 2 blocks away from the house in which I grew up. I’ve lived my whole life, minus a stint a coupla miles out of town when I was a toddler, within a couple block radius! That doesn’t mean I don’t travel though. See Denver anecdote above.
Thirdly, I will miss that you live in the cities because when I get down that way ( I live in west central MN) I always get a little excited thinking I might run into you. “What if I saw Charlotte from The Great Fitness Experiment here at IKEA?”, I say to myself. What if????
Lastly, try to enjoy. It’s hard to breathe in times of upheaval sometimes, but crawl in your closet and munch a few jellybeans if you need to.
Also, I LOVE Call the Midwife. I watched it during a hellish 3 months of all day nausea and vomiting due to the little baby that is lovingly Chuck-Norris kicking my bladder as I write. That show helped the nausea, I swear to glob.
How exciting! You’ll love Colorado! I work in the west metro area, and Lakewood, Golden, and Arvada all aren’t bad. I commute, though, so I don’t know the area really well, unfortunately.
BUT, if you’re looking for a Colorado buddy, shoot me an email! And just so this isn’t totally random: I’m actually good friends with Ted and Sacia from your Turbo class. Ted and I have known each other since kindergarten, and Sacia and I were roommates for awhile at the U of M. So you know. References 🙂 (Also, they gave me a signed copy of your book–so thank YOU for that!)
Much luck with your move!
I’m definitely a mover. I grew up in a military family and now I have my own military family. I loved it as a kid and love it even more as an adult. It can be hard to say goodbye, but the opportunities and new experiences are also exciting. I have moved 12 times total in my life, 6 times as an adult with kids. It’s stressful and fun at the same time. My most stressful move was when I had to plan the move and get out of our rental house with two small kids, all while my husband deployed. He came back, everything was done, and off we went. Easy for him, breakdown territory for me. But, we survived. Just enjoy it as much as possible. I think moving is a great experience for the kids too. I know a lot of people think it is traumatic on kids, but they learn to adapt and they get to experience new things and see a little more of the country. Enjoy the experience and best of luck to you!
I am doing my first color run in July and I can’t wait
How attached is your kitty to your current neighborhood? Does it have a posse? Sometimes kitties belong to people, and sometimes they’re just hanging out with whoever is feeding it that day. I had a roommate move in with a kitty which ran away home (3 miles away, across a freeway!) within 2 weeks. My family once sold a house and included the kitty in the sale because the house was her home. I’d personally let your friends take her in. You’ve got enough going on and it will be more of a relief to have that it off your plate than to worry about her for several months while you deal with getting your family settled in. There are loads of kitties in CO that your family will love just as well when the time is right.
As for my moves: sac-redding-dc-redding-santa Barbara-redding-Bellevue-Seattle-Ballard neighborhood-San Francisco-goleta-santa Barbara apt-Santa Barbara house-london-santa barbara. 15 moves in 29 years, huh. I’ve put down roots now, but need to leave once a month, if only so I can appreciate the feeling of coming home.
I am a stayer. I have moved a few times, but it’s been in the same area. My husband and I have been talking about moving closer to work, so I have been making a list of things I want to get fixed around the house. Oh, and getting rid of stuff…oh my goodness, why do I have all of this stuff?!!
Best of luck to you during this process. Try to stay as relaxed as possible- there is only so much you can control.
Also, while I like the idea of the Color Runs, I don’t like stuff thrown at my face, so I will stay away. However, I just read about one called the Electric Run- done at night with neon and glow in the dark stuff- that sounds like fun!
I went to 10 different school between K & 12th grade.
Since being married (almost 17 years), my husband and I have lived in 6 different places.
Now we are pretty much set until both boys finish HS (6 more years) and then hopefully one final move to a beach!
Good luck as you pack and do all of the 100s of things that along with a big move!!
I know good-byes are the hardest part – I’ll be thinking about you!!
Whoa, thanks for updating your post at the end, I was about to get really irate! I can’t believe people who leave their pets behind when they move.
Honestly I can’t recommend this, but here is what I would do in your situation: bring the cat and keep it quiet. I have an indoor-only cat, and who’s going to know? It’s not like a dog, where you would have to sneak it past the neighbors so she could go outside to do her business. I have kept cats in places where cats were technically not allowed, and no one was the wiser.
I can guarantee you wouldn’t be the first family to keep a cat there! In fact I would be willing to bet cash money that there is at least one other cat living there right now.
As an owner of a rental property (we can’t seem to sell our first house!) I have to respectfully disagree with this advice. We’ve had a couple of renters with ‘covert’ kitties and we can always tell by the smell. And the fur. I’m not anti-cat by any means,I’ve owned and loved several, but that’s a pretty big breech of renter-landlord trust and possibly illegal according to whatever rental agreement you’ve signed. Surely you can find a loving friend who will give your furry family member a good home for 3 months until you have your own house?
Oh, it’s a terrible idea. That’s why I specifically took care to point out that I do NOT recommend it. I’m just saying it’s what I would do under the circumstances.
I live in Colorado about one hour north of Denver. I’m not sure how far west you’re looking to live, but to me, Golden is one of the prettiest places in the state! Its gorgeous and the trails are fantastic. Sounds like you will have a great network and community wherever you go, but if you need any help or advice feel free to reach out. I recently moved here as well.
I’m allergic to cats, though, so can’t help you there 🙂
I’ve been a mover for most of my life. Living all over the place gives extra perspective in my opinion, which has influenced who I am. That said, I’m starting out my career now, and I wouldn’t mind staying in this area for a while.
As for Color Runs, they are more expensive than the average 5k, and the one I ran was so congested that I couldn’t really “run” optimally. Perhaps fun for a group activity, but if you’re a runner, you’ll need to set realistic expectations for the run.
I always thought I was a stayer. The idea of moving always made me want to vomit. But after we moved to Chicago I realize it wasn’t so bad. Now I would be sad if we moved but I know it wouldn’t be the end of the world!
As for the kitty, is the company paying for the corporate housing? If so, perhaps you could leave the kitty with your family and come get her later. If not, why not try to find a short term lease on your own?
Oh, I’m so happy and sad for you! I hear Colorado is amazing, even with the sadness of leaving Minnesota and all of your Buddies (Also, my bf from high school lives in MN and I always harbored this secret hope to meet you someday when I was visiting her. Guess I have to find a friend in Colorado now!)
I totally hear you on the mover/stayer thing. My parents moved me around a lot during my first 7 years of life, and even though I stayed in the same place for the next 11 years, I’ve never really had qualms about picking up and moving somewhere new. And I’ve never really understood those people who talked about moving somewhere new like they were going to get their fingernails yanked out. Which is how I’ve lived in 8 states. Husband isn’t opposed to moving either and both of our families are spread out all over the country. We both are kind of partial to New England now, but we sometimes ponder Washington, Oregon, California, Colorado, North Carolina…
Also, I have a friend that you need to hook up with in Colorado–she’s in need of a Gym Buddy, too!
I’m a mover who has somehow stayed put in central Illinois for the past decade, so I’m a bit jealous to read about your going to Colorado. But only a bit. I’ve actually enjoyed getting to know one place so well.
Before that, I was a Navy brat who grew up to travel to Japan twice as an exchange student, then join the Army, and then get a job teaching English in Morocco. Like you, I have found something to love about almost every place I’ve lived, especially Morocco, Hawaii, and Rhode Island. The only place I hated was Virginia Beach, and I think that was because I have always preferred smaller towns where I can walk around, and there we lived in the middle of a ginormous subdivision.Also, I was in high school at the time, and was taken from a small school (in Newport, RI) and taken to a school with over 2500 students. Also, in Newport, I could walk downtown, to the library, to the beach, to the park, etc., and then went to a place where the temperature hovered around 100 degrees all summer and if I walked for an hour I came to a gas station and a highway. My personal idea of hell.
But ten years ago, after teaching in Morocco, my husband and I moved “temporarily” to central Illinois and ended up buying a house and adopting a bunch of dogs. Meanwhile, I became interested in birds and prairies and have really come to love this place. I would happily move if the opportunity presented itself, but would sorely miss my “friends,” the meadowlarks, dickcissels, red-headed woodpeckers, etc.
So I guess I’m both a mover and a stayer.
Also, about the cat thing. I’m not a cat person (anymore) so I have no recent experiences to share. When I was a Navy brat kid, though, we always had cats, and we moved a lot. One of my cats was awesome, very adaptable no matter where we took him. I blame his premature death (from feline leukemia virus, before there was a vaccine) to the fact that I stopped liking cats. I was 11, he was literally my best buddy, and I think his dying so suddenly was just too harsh for me. But anyhoo…we then got another cat, who really hated moving. After move #1, from Virginia to Tennessee, he started “spraying” all over the house (previously completely litter box trained…so yuck.) After move #2, to Newport, RI, he also became a biter. So I guess cats, like people, vary quite a bit in their resilience in the face of change. Bottom line: if you (or your kids) would really be upset about being parted from your cat, then I would say, try to find a way to make it happen. (I adore my dogs and would never leave them, no matter what!) But if you’re on the fence, AND a loving family is ready to take your cat, AND you seriously think your cat does not do well with change…then I hate to be the dissenting voice, but if it were me, I would really stop and think about if re-homing my cat were the best thing to do. (And just to be clear–I love animals. I would never abandon my pets. Ever. But in my personal experience, some cats are OK with moving, and some aren’t.)
You are going to be SO missed! I hope your life in CO is wonderful for your family.
Cat advice: Agree that you don’t put a cat in non-cat housing. My college roommate was so deathly allergic to cats, she could never live in a place that previously had one regardless of how well the carpets were cleaned. I would try to keep her, however. Could she stay with someone you know here in MN until you are settled? I would offer our house, but Bella would throw a fit. We tried to cat sit for someone going on vacation and it lasted 5 minutes. We have driven a cat in a carrier cross country twice. She complained more than all of the kids put together, but it worked, and she adjusted. And that was the crazy-slit-your-throat-in-your-sleep cat. I think your cat could do it. And it would give you an excuse to come back to visit. 🙂
For the poll: I am a mover longing to be a stayer. 5 times in the first 8 years of marriage. I love where I am now and hope to stay until the kids leave for college. Then, when I am old, I would like to go somewhere that doesn’t involve pushing a snow blower from October to April.
Hey Charlotte! Allow me to extend a pre-welcome to CO!
I just moved out here myself from VT about 6 weeks ago. You’re going to love it out there, the fitness culture is outstanding!
Are you moving anywhere near Denver?
I love your blog and secretly hope that I run into you at the gym. While I’ve lived in Denver for over 8 years now I know the feeling of having to leave “your” gym. My company is moving downtown at the end of the month and thus I have to say goodbye to all my gym friends (I’m still pouting about this…) and slip into a new routine with new equipment layout, new people, etc.
Good luck with your move! Feel free to email me if you have any questions about the town, gym recs, whatever.
Of course I love all your pics BUT HOLY COW on the move!!!! That is quick!!! I have moved a lot so I will say nothing BUT wishing you the best & I hope it is a good move for all. IT is always tough on the kids too – I moved 4 times as a kid – be gentle as much as it is hard on you. 🙂 HUGS!
I’m the mover, my fiance is the stayer. I moved for school, graduate school, jobs, transfers, and I hadn’t stayed in one place consistently for more than three years since I turned 18 (now 32). Meanwhile, the fiance lived in the same house until he went to college one hour away from home, made one big move after college and has lived in the same city (in the same apartment!!!!) for ten years. Which is why we’re doing long distance while I do a two year stint for a job I just couldn’t turn down, and then I’m moving back and becoming (gulp!) a stayer too. I’m looking forward to it though. I feel like after years of being a mover, I actually want to be settled down somewhere 🙂
My husband and I have been married for 7 years and in that 7 years, we have moved 9 times and we are currently attempting to buy our first house making move number 10 once we succeed in buying one. 10 moves in 7 years… personally, I’m sick of it. I am really looking forward to having something permanent!
Congrats on your hubby’s new job and knowing where you’re going! The Rockies aren’t that bad. Granted, we live on the Wasatch Front and you’ll be around the back, but the Rockies collectively are BEAUTIFUL! You’ll LOVE IT!!!
I am most definitely a stayer. At the age of 41, I have moved exactly once, which was from the ‘rents home to the man’s after we married. However, if any place could make me a mover, it would be Denver. I am quite envious of you. I visited there 5 years ago it actually felt like home. The man & I are readying our house up right now for a move into a bigger place, which as far as I’m concerned could be down the street. And I hope my next move after that to a home or to heaven. I’m glad you’re taking the cat. You have such a compassionate heart you may regret it if you didn’t. Good Luck on your move!!
Noooo!!!!! I mean, I know I’ve only visited you once, but….there was always that possibility. Sad face.
But so exciting for you!!! I am a total mover. I stayed in AZ for grad school, but that was the longest I’d ever lived anywhere since moving out of my parents. ANd, actually, we moved a lot then too, but within the same city.
Denver is awesome. I’m jealous. This weather is AWFUL. Get out while you can!
Good luck and enjoy-do what you need to do to get through this! It will all work out.
By the way, during long drives when we were kids, my mom would pull out dry erase markers and paper towels and let us doodle or play tic tac toe on car windows. We thought it was the coolest thing ever! I know kids nowadays have a zillion screens to keep them occupied, but in case you need another idea…
And I dunno about the cat. My dog has always done ok with moves-if my stuff is there, he figures we’re staying, sniffs a lot and then settles down. But then again he’s a dog. Good luck with that one!
I’m a mover, so much a mover, I get chills of excitement hearing that you’re moving! How exciting! I’m thrilled for you and jealous! Your breakdown of movers/ stayers was the best explanation I’ve ever read. I grew up moving and of course it was hard at times but it taught me resilience. Reluctantly, I’ve lived in the same place for 12 years and yes of course there are advantages but I still want to move to virtually every town I visit. My husband calls it my Town Envy Syndrome. Congratulations!
You can probably get away with having the cat there with no one knowing, or even with them tacitly approving. It depends on the management. In suburban Baltimore for 2 years in a suburban complex owned by a large corporation, they officially charged pet rent for cats, but the manager’s personal policy was don’t ask, don’t tell. In addition to my permanent cat, I had 1-2 additional foster cats at a time. In downtown DC for 2 years, the only apartment I could find banned pets starting a year before I moved in. I was so worried about bringing the cat into the apartment, and would always hide him if the super knocked on my door, but bottom line was that the super knew about my cat and didn’t care, and the actual management never saw my apartment. I did have to find a place for the cat to go while they renovated my apartment, installing new windows and a new HVAC system, but it was otherwise fine. If they find out and object, you can find someone to cat sit.
Btw, on introducing cats in case you do need a cat sitter: My experience in introducing cats — which I’ve done maybe 12-15 times with foster cats — is that cats are unpleasant with new cats for just long enough that you will think that they will never get used to each other, but once you start despairing that they will ever get along, they will start licking each other, playing, sleeping, and being cute together. Cats rarely get along with kittens, but otherwise, if it’s 2-3 adult cats, it will be fine. They will be nasty and hiss and spit and fight for what feels like an unpleasantly long time, but usually within a week they accept it.
We are MOVERS, our favorite place was Colorado, too bad grad school was only 4 years!
Do take the cat, you can get a holistic drop called Anxiety that will help her relax in the first 30 minutes of travel (it’s great for grooming and vet appointments) once she is settled she’d sleep in her cat carrier, which is a must!
West Denver, lucky you towards the Mountains…Longmont is close, but south. Very nice city more of a big small town where lots of commuters live, Good Schools. Longs Peak will be on your bucket list for sure!! Easy day’s climb….just get used to high altitude first. This is an exciting new adventure with some wonderful parks and mountains to climb. This summer you will not need the Y or any place the costs money to get your workout in. The great outdoors are calling you and the kids to come check us out! AND the winters in CO are so mild compared to MN, you will love that!
Take a deep breath and embrace what you learned in MN and don’t think of it as a door closed, but a very large picture window with some great scenery to boot!
Love that Jane recommended Longmont! I live here, and it is a nice town (actually north of Denver), but… I can’t in good conscience recommend it if your husband will be commuting to the west metro. I do that drive a couple times a week and used to do it every day (thank goodness for work at home flexibility) and the commute is horrible. Especially if it snows. There aren’t many alternatives to I-25 and it is stop and go from 120th on south on a good day. Forget it if there’s an accident–it might take me 2-3 hours to get to work.
Also a great point about the altitude. I was in great shape when I moved here, but the altitdue floored me. I think it took six months before I felt up to a regular workout. Be gentle and patient with yourself–hopefully it won’t take you as long to adapt!
Congrats… and consolations!
Oh, I am SO a mover. Right now I am living in the Maldives with my husband and pre-schooler. Pre-kiddo we also lived together in Malaysia, and pre-hubs I’ve lived on my own in India, Nepal and Mongolia. And that’s not counting all the cities I’ve lived in in my home country, New Zealand! I’m a firm believer that home is wherever you make it. Now that I have a family, home is wherever they are.
How exciting! We will be happy to follow your adventures in Colorado!
I guess I am a mover, although it does not feel like it right now. (Right before reading your blog post, I just checked out a new job in another city, for example.)
I have made a few cross-Atlantic moves. From Sweden to USA, and then back to Sweden again, and then back to USA again, and then back to Sweden, and then to Canada and back to Sweden, and to Canada, again, and back to Sweden… It seems like it should be another word for it… perhaps I am a YO-YO?
Good luck!
Wow, that’s exciting! Good luck with the move… also, I’d take the cat. Ours has moved with us four times. 🙂
One other important point, or word of caution, about Colorado. The fitness culture here is intense. Everyone has a thing, and it often feels like you need to have a “thing” too, whether its 80 miles of biking on weekends or constantly training for the next triathlon. It’s nice that the culture is so health conscious but it can feel a little overwhelming at times, even for a relatively active person.
NOOOO! I am moving to Mn in 4 weeks and was so excited to stalk you… uh, I mean, MEET you somehow. at a gym or store or whatever. 🙂
I’m right there with you on the stress… just found out today that I got the job so it is gonna be a wild ride to get all of my stuff over there.
Here’s to both of us managing to not lose our minds. 🙂
Oh no! Where are you moving to in MN? I’m sorry I missed you – I would have loved to meet you! But you are coming to an amazing place:)
Good luck with the move… and your sanity;)
I can’t believe I’m the first to say this, but
In West Philadelphia, born and raised…
On the playground is where I spent most of my days! Chillin out, maxin, relaxin all cool and all shootin some bball outside of the school… 😉