Just like performing three posthumous miracles will get you sainted in Catholic circles, there is a litmus test to determine true health nuts. While this won’t get you a cathedral named in your honor (but neither will you have to be martyred, so there is that) you will get a metaphorical halo and intestines of …
“Sugar can be the willpower you need to undereat”?!? The fact that this ever made sense to people just shows you how reliable diet experts are. Food and I, we go way back. And it hasn’t always been smooth sailing. Sure the boob juice and I were muy simpatico but then my brother was conceived …
Salma Hayek has an amazing rack – and I’m not talking about her ability to fill a sweater, er, movie role. They’re amazing because of their ability to feed a baby. It’s the real secret in Victoria’s Secret – breasts are not just fun bags. They also squirt milk. Which I suppose could also be …
Well, that’s going to leave a mark! The Gym Buddies, 30 (ish) of you readers and I are halfway done with January’s Great Fitness Experiment. And what do I have to show for it? Sore muscles every single day, a ton of sweaty gym laundry and a bruise the size of a softball on my …
“Chips and a rice krispie treat!” My first-grader chirped happily. “That’s what you had for lunch?” I asked incredulously as the preschooler started the tantrum process (everything must be equal in this household) and the baby took up a chorus of “Chip! Chip!!!!” “Oh yeah, and a chocolate milk.” (Note to self: the mystery of …
The ’00s will officially be known as the decade we paid money to have holes in our pants. I am evil. My first thought upon seeing this pic of wee teenaged overly pimped out (in both the literal and metaphorical senses) Miley Cyrus was, “Huh! Even skinny starlets get muffin top!” (Although my first thought …
There’s one way to turn a negative into a positive! 2009 was a big year for me. Not only did I have a baby, write a book (which is still held up with the publisher and no I don’t know why and yes I’m about ready to tear my hair out and/or give it away …
One of the things I find most mystifying about this season (besides wondering why nobody ever writes new Christmas songs – I’m a fan of all the big holiday hits but a girl can only hear Jingle Bell Rock so many times, especially if it’s Mariah Carey singing it) is why people want to wait …
Him: Do you have any idea how many calories are in that thing?! Me: [out loud] Um…Me: [silently] Yes you idiot. I know how many calories are in everything. I’ve internalized the nutritional information of so many things that it’s practically written on my DNA. In fact, it’s impossible for me to even be in …
Whether it was some quirk of the Google gods or my Internet karma coming back to smack me for writing about Will Ferrell, a post I wrote about trying (and failing) the Every Other Day Diet has come back to haunt me. Some people get ghosts in chains that inspire them to buy large turkeys …
